Foreword. I'm writing this under the influence of solpadeine and a strong IPA cos my shoulder has been on fire for the last few weeks so be kind to any spelling errors.
My parents, and i suspect a lot of Irish parents were a bit bizarre about what they let me watch as a young lad. Bloody violence was ok but the second a pair of boobs appeared i was shipped off to bed. A prime example i remember was The Terminator (aka my second favourite action film of the 80's). I was 7 the first time i saw it. I was terrified but i loved it. Arnie cutting a swathe across Los Angeles. Gunning down the population of a police station! Ripping out a punk's heart!! I couldn't believe i was being let see it. This was great. Then we saw Sarah Connor's nipple and i didn't get to see the rest of the film for 4 years. Brutal violence was fine but a boob. Nope. That was the step too far.
Luckily Predator contained no boobs.
Because of that i got to see Predator numerous times in my formative years and fell in love with it. And i still love it to this day.
A special forces unit walks through a central American jungle. Their mission is to rescue the occupants of a helicopter that has crashed in guerrilla territory. It looks like its going to be a straight forward mission until they come across a pile of skinned bodies and they realise they are being hunted by someone. OR SOMETHING. DUN DUN DUNNNNNN. Ok, if you one of the poor misfortunates left on the planet who hasn't seen this there are spoilers coming up. They are being hunted by an alien who kills its prey and takes trophies. But the alien hasn't counted on them being a shower of hardy fuckers who will give as good as they get. Or has it?
Arnold Schwarzenegger plays Dutch Schaefer, the head of the unit. Arnie gets a lot of grief over his acting ability. Most of it is justified but he's perfect here. His monosyllabic delivery suits the role and he just looks like he could take on a 7 foot tall alien and conceivably win. The man is like a brick wall and has undeniable presence. Carl Weathers plays Dillon, the group supervisor. Another big lump of a hooer. Shane Black ( who wrote the film ), Bill Duke, Sonny Landham, Richard Chaves & Jesse Ventura play the other team members. They don't exactly play deep parts but they are well characterised, you'll easily tell them apart and they all get their moment in the sun, especially Landham who's character seems to have some form of unexplained mystic connection to the Predator.
I love this film. It's lean as hell, not a scene or second is wasted. Every line moves the story forward or helps build characterisation. The music is perfect. Suits the jungle setting and builds tension and its percussive blasts propel the action forward splendidly. The jungle setting ensures the film stays timeless too. No dated 80's fashion to cringe over. No crappy 'Flock Of Seagulls' songs wedged in. Plus it's full of that lovely grittiness that today's action films seem to always lack. This is a film that was proud of its R-Rating. It wears it like a badge of honour. Blood and guts all over the gaff.
It's not perfect. Films rarely are. 1 piece of cringe-worthy homophobia mars the opening scene and the one woman in the film has an absolutely pointless role. She gets one scene of note and then spends the rest of the film running and cowering. It's a pity and the Predator's attitude to women is something that gets (slightly) more screen time in the sequel.
Negative aspects aside i just love it. It's a film I've owned on VHS, DVD and Blu-ray and yet ill still stop and watch it when i come across it on tv. Which happens quite a lot actually. Seems the TV stations know it still has a big fan-base and show it accordingly.
And you know what? Im going to watch it again now. I know, i'm brutal.
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