Kidney stones part 3

Left kidney stone 0 Me 1

Hahaha. The left one was the worst. Screw you kidney stone. The doctors told me the right one would be a piece of piss.

Never trust doctors.

I went into Nenagh for my first round of blasting on the right side stone. I'd been 3 times for the left side and while miserable and sore it did work so i was optimistic. 20 minutes later it was over. Grand, happy days, the tech was happy with the progress so I went home happy.

At 4am the next morning I woke assuming I'd been knifed in my sleep. The pain was absolutely septic. I'd genuinely never felt this bad before even after bone breaks. Like a fool I thought i could get through it, it will be fine. Grand sure. No bothers. Like hell did it go away. It felt like someone had poked a sharp object into my right flank and was twisting it around looking for treasure. After 4 hrs of fooling myself and doing my own version of Lamaze breathing I had to bite the bullet and ask for a lift to Limerick A&E. A dystopian nightmare of a place where i'd have at least a 12hr wait before i could even lie down.

But it was a bank holiday weekend. That magical time where all the sick people vanish away to Ballybunion and within a couple of hours I was both high as a kite on difene and lying down in a trolley. It got better. Within another 2 hours i had a bed. This is great I thought. I'll be sorted soon.

48 hrs later I had an operation. 48 hrs. Ugh. There is no more boring place than a hospital when you are waiting for something to happen. Time goes backwards there. An x-ray had shown the blasting had worked but not well enough. Instead of powdering the stone it had broken lumps off it and those lumps were caught between my kidney and bladder in what my surgeon jokingly (haha jokes, g'way you gowl) called a cobblestone path. They had to go in (I'll let you use your imagination as to the entrance) and grab the rubble.

2 hrs later i woke up in tatters. There was blood. There was squirming. There was a big fuck off catheter. Luckily i was once again bombed off my face on the good drugs so I conked and had a weird dream where me and Dave Grohl became fast friends. The next day I was told the rubble was gone but there was still a big stone in my right side. "But you told me it was a small one?" says I to the doctor. "Only small compared to the golf ball on your right side" says he. Oh joy.

So I'm back into the hospital on the 23rd. St John's this time. Not half as horrible as the regional. Hopefully this will be the end of it. Hopefully.

Wish me luck.