Night In Paradise

Tae-goo (Lee Ki-young) is very good at his job. A rival company wants him to come and work for them but he's happy where he is. The other company don't take rejection well so they kill his family. Yeah. Headhunting in South Korea is serious business it seems especially when it comes to the criminal underworld. Tae-goo uses his assassination skills to get revenge which causes all manner of internal strife for the crime faction he works for and while the higher hopes try to squash the beef he goes to lay low on Jeju island. While there he meets a kindred spirit named Jae-yeon (Jeon Yeo-been). Jae-yeon is dying, she hasn't got long left, and as she fades physically, Tae-goo's already gone psychologically. Can this odd friendship survive the chaos coming their way? Chaos led by Chief Ma (Cha Seung-won), an extremely sadistic piece of work hellbent on fixing corporate issues.

When you go into a film knowing one of the main characters has lost everything in life and the other has a terminal illness you wouldn't be blamed for not expecting much in the way of fun. But when Night In Paradise fades to black you'll hopefully be grinning like a blood crazed loon wondering what in the name of jesus did you just watch. It's a feeling you get a lot when you watch Korean cinema. You might want to go have a shower and maybe hug a loved one if you're lucky enough to have one in your bubble but you'll know you just watched something you'll remember for quite a while.

This is an odd one. A film caught between contemplation and chaos, an art house piece spiked with video nasty violence. It may be too languid for the action crowd, too full of pierced flesh and mangled faces for the arty set but if you can get through the opening half hour that sets the tone for the film with it's mix of the ponderous and the graphic you'll be fine for the next 100 minutes. Plus if you can stay with it you'll be treated to a couple of action set-pieces that once again blow away anything coming out of America. When a simple shootout between gangsters in a fish shed is more visceral and exciting than an entire Superhero movie you know you're on the right track. The action cinema of East Asia is always a joy to behold. Clear geography within a scene, no juddery editing, no requirements to keep things family friendly, just sweet sweet carnage of the kind that makes you appreciate the wonders of film making.

It's violence might make you squeak but it's the chemistry between Jae-yeon and Tae-goo that makes it work. She's accepted death is on her doorstep, he's numb to the world. At first they hate each other but shared misery and vodka brings them together and a great scene over a (surprisingly appetising looking) bowl of raw fish stew bonds them. Lee Ki-young & Jeon Yeo-been both nail their parts, especially in the instances where their humanity shines through, for him an early scene of excitement and joy and for her a late scene where she realises she still has the ability to care. Cha Seung-won has a whale of a time as the man bringing horror upon them. He's a vile creation but not a one note one. Like the other characters he's layered, capable of surprising you and one decision he makes brings me to my only real issue with the film.

Something happens in the last 5 minutes that really jars with everything that's come before. A scene that's so over the top you won't sure whether to laugh or shout profanely at the screen. Even the vehicular mayhem and the ....hmmmm, let's just call it fun with knives, from earlier doesn't hint at the lunacy that ends the story. Depending on your disposition it may either ruin the whole thing for you or be the blood soaked cherry on top. Me, I loved it, but I'm warped.

Night In Paradise is streaming on Netflix now. It's a good one.

31 Day James Bond Challenge. Day 31

 

31

Easy. The bridge jump from The Man With The Golden Gun. Nothing else compares.

In that glorious time before CGI things like this had to be done for real and man alive this one still makes me giddy. We just won't mention the silly Carry On style sound effect director Guy Hamilton inexplicably decided to lay over it.

Check out this webpage to see exactly how they did it. It's a very interesting read. 

Held

Held is the type of film you'll watch and maybe think "Nah, that's ridiculous, that would never happen" and then your mind will wander back to stories about scary Reddit pages and the unsettling subcultures brewing unchecked within. You'll turn it over in your mind and then you'll find yourself thinking "this could actually happen" and eventually "christ I'll be amazed if this isn't already happening." Metaphorically of course.

I like when a film leaves you thinking. Most don't. Most won't challenge you in anyway other than when you see an actor and wonder where you've seen them before. It's one thing horror movies do well, taking the big social issues of the day and forcing their audience to look at said issues through a scare infused prism, so that you see things from different points of view, in ways you'd never think of. Held does it's job very well in this regard and it's a watch that may well leave a (hopefully small) proportion of the audience pondering their own behaviour.

Emma (Jill Awbrey who also wrote this) is getting away from it all. She's arrived at a high tech holiday home in the middle of nowhere and her husband Henry (Bart Johnson) is on his way. Things haven't been the best between them lately and this weekend in the countryside might be just the thing needed to rebuild the intimacy that's been lacking in their relationship. After a night filled with wine and tension they wake up to find their phones missing, the doors locked and strange incisions behind their ears. A disembodied voice fills the air, commands are given and the pain begins....

If you have been known to utter the phrase "not all men" this might make your head cave in. If sexual politics make you uncomfortable you might want to give this one a miss. If you're mature and open and honest enough to watch a film that delves into them you might just like Held. You won't enjoy it exactly but come the end you'll realise this one that turned into something far more interesting than the schlocky home invasion thriller the opening scenes will have you expecting. It's built around a clever script from Awbrey, one that takes the clues dropped in the opening scenes and returns to them in ways you won't expect, all the while subtly turning up the tension that's with us from the first frame, until it reaches a climax that will have you shouting at the screen as our leads use what they've learned from their situation to saves themselves. It's always handy to have a couple of sharp implements around too of course. 

Horror works best when you give a damn about the people onscreen and Awbrey & Johnson play a couple you'll be able to relate to. They've been through the wars before the film even starts, trauma in their past has brought them to where they are now. They just want to be happy. But the cracks are visible from the start. A polite decline, an annoyed expression, little things that grow from slightly askew at first, to skin crawling near the end. Awbrey especially sells it all, even when things take a silly turn late in the day. But that silly turn, as mentioned in the first paragraph of this review, is one that, in the bizarro world of 2021, is always feasible.

Held is streaming online now. It's worth your time.

Giannetto De Rossi R.I.P.

Special make up effect extraordinaire Giannetto De Rossi passed away today aged 79 and my god did the man leave a memorable body of work behind him. Not many people get to work in Bernardo Bertolucci epics, notorious Joe D'Amato pukefests, Charles Bronson mafia thrillers, medieval actioners with Sean Connery voiced dragons, Sylvester Stallone action flicks, New French extreme cinema and not one, not two, but three video nasties. Here's 5 of his best moments. There's so much more but youtube is being a wagon. Be warned. These clips are NSFW.

 Zombie Flesh Eaters

   

The Beyond

Rambo III

Zombie Holocaust

Haute Tension

Tasty.

Smug diner bastard

Superman II.

Yup. 

I hear the name and you think Clark and Lois, the Niagara falls bit, of Zod, of Terence Stamp's cockney accent, of that huge battle at the end that rips Metropolis apart. But you always forget about the diner scene that traumatised 1000's of kids who thought Superman was untouchable.

Remember this smug looking prick?

Superman aka Clark Kent has fallen in love with Lois Lane. Her likewise. But they can't be together as he is a superbeing ( the film doesn't explain this but I assume he'd shag her to death or something if they ended up in the leaba). Anyway. He travels to the fortress of solitude and gives up his superpowers for her. They go for a meal in a Metropolis diner when they get back. They encounter a pure rude bastard in there. A real bully boy who thinks he owns the gaff. Despite seeing her with Clark he tries it on with her. Lois is insulted. Clark decides to defend her honour and in a scene that still horrifies me *sob* gets the head beaten off him. 

Oh I hate it. So much. It's so hard to watch. It's so cringy and horrible. Clark sees his own blood for the first time in his life and experiences a big dose of pain, shame and regret. The woman he loves has seen him at his lowest. Now he knows what being human truly is. He gets payback later in the film but this scene has always stayed with me. And I have no idea why.

31 Day James Bond Challenge. Day 29/30

 

29 - To my eternal shame I've never read a Bond book.

30 - The Living Daylights. Bond is in Gibraltar. Spy practice turns deadly and Bond has to take care of business up on the side of that crazy rock. Action and violence ensues and the sequence ends with Bond literally parachuting into a strange woman's bed. Who is of course instantly smitten with him. It's a brilliant introduction to Timothy Dalton, the most underrated of all the Bond incarnations.

17 films on TV this week for your viewing pleasure

Enemy Of The State   Sat   10/4   Sony Movies @ 21.00

A murder is accidentally caught on film and when the evidence is slipped to a lawyer without his knowledge, he finds himself running for his life while trying to uncover a conspiracy that reaches the higher echelons of Washington politics. Will Smith and Tony Scott combine their talents to give us a winning Saturday night watch. It's exciting, it's funny and it all leads to a satisfying climax. Gene Hackman, Regina King, Jason Lee, Lisa Bonet and many many more all do well.

The Shallows   Sat   10/4   CH4 @ 23.25

While surfing by herself in a deserted Mexican cove, Nancy is attacked by a great white shark. Trapped on a tiny rocky outcrop she must use her wits to survive the encounter. This is agreeable stuff, scary, nerve wracking and of course spectacularly silly (do not watch this expecting anything serious) but Blake Lively as Nancy sells the fear and eventually the inner strength needed to take on mother nature at her fiercest. 

Queen Of Katwe   Sun   11/4   BBC1 @ 14.35

A slum in the Uganda city of Kampala is where Phiona's story begins, when her teacher introduces her to the game of chess and it opens a gateway to a whole new world for her. This 2016 drama is a perfect Sunday afternoon watch for all the family. It can be upsetting in places as social classes clash but it's also hugely humane and uplifting when they become transcended. Madina Nalwanga, Lupita Nyong'o and David Oyelowo do lovely work.

Rebecca   Sun   11/4   Talking Pictures TV @ 14.55

Alfred Hitchcock's fantastic adaption of the Daphne Du Maurier novel is about a new bride trying to deal with the presence of her husband's dead first wife in her new home. A wonderful looking and very influential film led by magnificent turns from Laurence Oliver, Joan Fontaine and especially Judith Anderson as the looming Mrs Danvers. Quite different to Hitchcock's other films in tone and all the more enjoyable for it.

Tigerland   Sun   11/4   TCM @ 21.00

A young infantry recruit training for Vietnam in 1971 Louisiana tries to fight back against the system but the system is having none of it. This is the film that made Colin Farrell a star. He's just magnetic in the role of the rebellious Boz and IMO no film since has used his potential as much as this one did. An excellent evocation of a very turbulent period. Watch out for Michael Shannon & Shea Whigham in early roles.

My Cousin Rachel   Sun   11/4   CH4 @ 22.55

After his cousin who raised him from childhood dies, a man sets out to get revenge on the woman who may have killed him. But like most things in life it's far easier said than done. Especially when said cousin looks like Rachel Weisz. Like Rebecca above this is adapted from a book by Daphne Du Maurier and it is an atmospheric and beautiful looking mystery about the power of seduction and control. Sam Claflin as the lead does well but Weisz owns this story.

Brothers Of The Head   Mon   12/4   Film4 @ 01.55

Barry and Tom are conjoined twins and Nick Sidney is going to make them famous. On his terms though, definitely not on theirs. Using the same mockumentary format that worked so well for This Is Spinal Tap this time we get a story from the world of punk and the lunacy that existed within. It's not fully successful and it will offend some but it's a watchable oddity led by a pair of mighty performances from real life brothers Luke and Harry Treadaway.

Master And Commander : The Far Side Of The World   Mon   12/4   Film4 @ 21.00 

Russell Crowe stars in this epic adaption of the Patrick O'Brian's book as the captain of a ship tasked with chasing down a French battleship during the Napoleonic wars. A cracking adventure packed full of tension and action, gorgeous scenery and naval detail. This is still Crowe's finest role (imo) but Paul Bettany more than holds his own as the ship's doctor. Really worth a watch. Oh and turn up your speakers because this will give them a real workout.

Detroit   Mon   12/4   TG4 @ 21.30

Detroit, Michigan. The Algiers motel. 1967. A group of teenagers get caught up in the aftermath of a race riot and have the misfortune to come into contact with a group of police officers. Based on real life this Kathryn Bigelow drama is a harsh, tense look at race relations in the US of A. John Boyega and an unsettling Will Poulter lead a cast full of faces you'll recognise. Not a film you could enjoy but an important one nonetheless.

Re-Animator   Tues   13/4   The Horror Channel @ 23.10

80's horror at its best in this tale of a psychotic student scientist who has figured out the secret to re-animating dead flesh. Everything goes pear shaped. In the goriest way possible. A very entertaining film if you have a strong stomach and a willingness to just go with the bizarre onscreen events. Jeffrey Combs has the role of a lifetime as the man with the plan. Don't watch this if you are in any way squeamish.

His Girl Friday   Wed   14/4   Talking Pictures TV @ 00.30

Hildy's a reporter. Walter's her boss. Hildy wants a divorce from her husband. Her husband Walter. Hildy wants to remarry. Walter is appalled at the idea. This is brilliant fun, a classic from the Golden Era of Hollywood that's filled with imminently quotable dialogue, stellar showings from Rosalind Russell and Cary Grant and it all moves so fast you won't be able to look away from the screen for a second.

Get Carter   Wed   14/4   ITV4 @ 23.15

Jack Carter isn't a man to be messed with and when he travels north to investigate his brother's death in Newcastle you know things aren't going to end well. For anyone. This is a crime masterpiece. Edgy, darkly funny, brutally violent and packed to the brim with dialogue you'll recognise even if you haven't seen the film before. Michael Caine is stunning in the lead role & the supporting cast is full of faces you'll remember.

Chef   Thur   15/4   CH4 @ 01.50

Until a confrontation with a restaurant blogger went viral Carl used to own a successful restaurant. Now he's on the road with a food truck, his son and his best friend and he's trying to fall in love with cooking again. This comedy drama from writer/director/star Jon Favreau is a delightful watch and one you'll want to enjoy with food beside you because you will be starving during it. Seriously, be prepared. Stockpile tayto's.

Animals   Thur   15/4   Film4 @ 21.00

A pair of best friends called Laura & Tyler are living the good life in Dublin fuelled by drink and drugs. They are inseparable and Laura's family has taken the American Tyler under their wing. Then Laura gets engaged and things start to change. A fine film about friendships and the ups and downs they must endure if they have to evolve. Holliday Grainger and a gleaming Alia Shawkat rock the leads and it's always nice to see Pat Shortt and Olwen Fouéré onscreen.

Dead Calm   Thur   15/4   TCM @ 23.50

Following a life altering tragedy, a couple on a boating holiday at sea take in the survivor of a boat wreck. Of course things go sideways. Don't they always. A blistering thriller that never gets dull despite being mostly set onboard a small ship. Believable performances and a tonne of tension make this a nail biting watch. Nicole Kidman and Sam Neill are in wicked form as the couple and Billy Zane makes for a memorable baddie

3.10 To Yuma   Fri   15/4   TG4 @ 21.05

Infamous outlaw Ben Wade has been captured and is to be taken to Yuma by train to be hanged. Rancher Dan Evans needs money so takes a job escorting Ben to his death. Ben is an infamous outlaw for a reason though. This 2007 remake of the classic western of the same name is more bombastic and over the top than the original but a brace of committed performances from Christian Bale, Russell Crowe and Ben Foster override any of the silliness.

Shot Caller   Fri   15/4   Film4 @ 23.45

A stupid decision at a restaurant changes the course of Harlan's life and when he ends up in prison he has to make a decision that will change his family's life forever. Nikolaj Coster-Waldau does solid work in this damning indictment of the US penal system, a place where rehabilitation is a mere theory and violence is the only currency. A tough but worthwhile watch. Lake Bell, Jon Bernthal and a scary Holt McCallany offer strong support.

As always retweets are appreciated if you find this helpful or discover a new favourite.

31 Day James Bond Challenge. Day 28

 

This changes on a weekly basis but this week it's this one. A song that's so much better than the film it's from. My top 3 are this, Licence To Kill and You Only Live Twice.

Thunder Force

What do Tammy, The Boss, The Life Of The Party, Happy Time Murders, Superintelligence and Thunder Force have in common? All were films directed by Ben Falcone and all starred the wonderful Melissa McCarthy, two halves of a married couple who've turned into a formidable force in Hollywood in the last few years. What else do these films have in common? Well that's easy, they're all bad and the latest, Thunder Force, carries on the tradition in admirable fashion.

Melissa McCarthy is a force to be reckoned with. A brilliant physical comedian with a talent for a killer one liner. 7 years in The Gilmore Girls put her on the map, 2011's Bridesmaids gave her an Academy award nomination and made Hollywood stand up and take notice and 2015's Spy cemented her status as one of the funniest women in films today. But all that good work is being undone by the absolute dross she's appeared in over the last few years (Can You Ever Forgive Me? aside). Thunder Force, out now on Netflix isn't the worst of her husband's film she's starred in but it's not far off. It's annoying because it's a film you'll want to like, a new entry into a genre that's ridiculously over represented onscreen at the moment that shakes things up a little, with two women, over 40, one of colour, headlining proceedings instead of the usual array of musclebound hunks. You'd assume it would be worth your time wouldn't you....

Spring 1983. A comet strikes Earth and a lucky few are granted superpowers as a result. Unfortunately only those with sociopathic tendencies are affected and before long supervillains are running amok and ordinary citizens are dying in their droves. Among them are the Stanton's, a pair of scientists working on ways to give these powers to law abiding folk, in the hope they can fight back. Before their work is done they are killed and their daughter Emily (Tai Leshaun/Octavia Spencer) is orphaned. As an adult she's become a scientist and is on the verge of creating a superhero serum that she plans to use on herself. Until Lydia Berman (Melissa McCarthy), an estranged friend from childhood comes bumbling back into her life and messes up all her plans.

You might laugh once, maybe twice during this if you're feeling particularly charitable but mostly you'll be cringing and feeling as embarrassed as some of the actors onscreen look. Octavia Spencer especially looks mortified as lazy dialogue spills out of her and lazier action scenes fall apart around her. Jason Bateman as bad guy henchman The Crab is clearly having an out of bad experience throughout and Bobby Cannavale as big bad The King has just given up altogether and pieced together a character out of the worst bits of his past performances. Add these to an unlikable lead character played by McCarthy on cruise control and you have a genuinely shoddy watch. To top it off it's build around a script that consists of half developed setpieces that really add up to nothing and go nowhere. 

To it's credit it doesn't finish with the usual city destroying climax we see in superhero films, instead going for a more personal confrontation in an office building but you get that feeling that's built around Falcone's directorial limitations instead of going for a more novel ending. That sounds mean but it's a fierce shame to waste the talents of McCarthy and Spencer in a story that could have used it's position to take potshots at genre tropes and societal views of women but gives us pratfalls and painful improvised mugging instead.

Thunder Force is available on Netflix from today. Don't watch it.

31 Day James Bond Challenge. Day 27

 

"MY BROTHA BILLY BOB'S GOT THE FASTEST BOAT ON THE BAYOU!!"

He feels desperately out of place but the Louisiana scenes with Sheriff J Dubya Peppa from Live And Let Die kill me every time. Deeply stupid, borderline offensive, always funny.

A perfect pairing of Sound & Vision - 28 Days Later

Imagine waking up in a hospital to find it deserted and thrashed. You've been in a coma for nearly a month, you're starved and dehydrated, there's no nurses or doctors around. There's no one outside, there's no traffic, there's no sound at all. And you're in the very heart of the city London. This is the predicament Jim (Cillian Murphy) finds himself in below.

 

The song is East Hastings and the band is Canadian experiment Godspeed You! Black Emperor and rarely has a song in a film so matched the action onscreen. Sparse strings nailing the disorientation Jim (and us) is feeling at the sight of empty streets that should be packed to bursting. Panic setting in with a chugging guitar riff overhead as the horror of the situation begins to hit home and then that rapid tempo shift (and a wicked jump scare) building to a brutal Trafalgar square set crescendo where Jim truly realises the enormity of the nightmare he's stuck in. It's terrifying stuff, director Danny Boyle has our nerves shredded before we even see a single thing. It's brilliantly economical film making, letting the music lead us through the clues before nailing us at the end. Poor Jim. This is only the start of a very crappy week for you bud.

Previous pairings

La Haine

The Skeleton Twins

Pat Garrett & Billy The Kid

Notting Hill

Summer Of Sam

Vamp

American Me

Beetlejuice

Rio Bravo

Hard Boiled
8 mile
Wheels On Meals
The Office (UK)
Do The Right Thing
Se7en
Mad Men
The Colour Of Money
Rules Of Attraction

Jackass II

Game Of Thrones 

Apocalypse Now

Blade

Big
Miller's Crossing

The Blues Brothers

Straight Outta Compton

The Princess Bride

American Honey

Snake In The Eagle's Shadow

On Her Majesty's Secret Service

The Untouchables

Airplane!

Dazed And Confused  

Kickboxer                                  

Grosse Point Blank

Mean Streets

Watership Down

Casablanca

Zodiac

Jackie Brown
The Good, The Bad And The Ugly
Deliverance
The Omen
Copland
Buffy The Vampire Slayer
The Mission

Before Sunset

Carlito's Way
A Knight's Tale
Platoon
Before Sunrise
Rushmore
An American Werewolf In London
Dazed And Confused
Boogie Nights
Raging Bull
Almost Famous
Once Upon A Time In The West
Goodfellas

Last Of The Mohicans

31 Day James Bond Challenge. Day 26

 

Moneypenny. Gotta have Moneypenny. She'd tell you the real M16 deal.

Scaramanga. He'd have some brilliant hitman stories and his Golden Gun would be a wicked conversation starter.

Magda. For giving us the coolest scene in the entire franchise (the balcony twirl from Octopussy) she gets a seat at the table without a doubt.

General Orlov. Another face from Octopussy. This chap is a lunatic. He'd add an unpredictable edge to proceedings.

Pussy Galore. Her no nonsense ways would keep Orlov in check. She took no shit from Goldfinger so Orlov would be a piece of cake.

Baron Samedi. Because he's fun and I want to know how he survived those Live and Let Die snakes.

Pam Bouvier from Licence to Kill. Because she rocks. 

Valentin Zukovsky. This Goldeneye stalwart would supply the vodka and caviar.

And there you have it. No Bond of course. Who wants to listen to him boasting.