Fave Films of the century so far - 2001 - A Knight's Tale

A Knight's Tale mightn't be the best film of 2001 but it's certainly one of the most entertaining and it's definitely my favourite. A story of a young squire named William Thatcher (hopefully not a relation to the other one) who on a whim disguises himself as his late master and not only enters jousting tournaments but starts winning them too. 

It's a simple story that's very well told. It's hilarious, bursting with heart, full of romance and has a killer soundtrack. Yup. It might be set in the 14th century but it's full of 20th century tunes. Queen, Sly and The Family Stone, Thin Lizzy and War all turn up. It's a film that doesn't take itself one bit seriously and it plays very fast and loose with historical fact. Scholars and historians scoffed at the time but who cares when it's all so entertaining. Look at the scene below. Bowie's tunes slot into a Medieval banquet just perfectly don't they. You'll start smiling as soon as you hear the first "angel" and you won't stop til the music stops.

Cinematic bliss. My fave dance scene ever. It's so underrated and it's a film so many people haven't heard of or have avoided because it looks silly. You're missing out on a brilliant slice of fun. Mark Addy, Paul Bethany and Alan Tudyk are all great craic. Rufus Suwell is the perfect boo hiss bad guy who gets a very satisfying comeuppance. Shannyn Sossamon is a beautiful, spirited and not one bit demure lead and Heath Ledger is just a superb, funny and heroic in the mould of all the swashbuckling stars of yesteryear. His death in 2008 was so sad, such a waste of talent.

It's a perfect companion piece to The Princess Bride, another medieval tale full of knowing post modern humour. If you enjoyed that you will enjoy this.

Now I want to watch it again. Damn.

2000

Thank You Come Again

"You know that phrase "If you shoved a lump up your arse a diamond would come out"? If I shoved a diamond up my gee, dust would come out."

That's an actual line of dialogue in Thank You Come Again.

No. I'm not joking. I really wish I was.

I love Irish films. I'll always give them a go. It's great getting to see them in the cinema because only a handful of them ever make it past the M50. Even the bad ones are worth sitting through in their entirety in the hope that there will be some bit of goodness to be uncovered. Last night's film was Thank You Come Again. It had no uncovered goodness and it's quite possibly the worse film I've seen this century.

Thank You Come Again is the name of a adult shop ran by an ineffectual wimp called Fergus (John Billy Kennerk) and his one employee, the sex crazed Mary (Dannii Byrne). His best friend Dillon (John Sweeney) is the vilest creation in the history of Irish cinema and he's a man so hated by everyone he has nowhere to be but hanging around the shop annoying everyone. One day amongst the jobseekers, demonic girlfriends, randy priests, gobshite hipsters and deviants who make up their clientele they find a bag of blood diamonds and it sets them on a collision course with the people who lost them.

This could have been fun if it had been 5 minutes long and had ended with Dillon, Mary and Fergus being tied up, shot and set on fire. Sadly it doesn't end like that. It's 100 minutes of pain, cringe and some of THE worst acting you'll ever see wrapped up in a story that's so 1990's that it actually hurts. Writer/Director Stephen Clarke Dunne has made the hideous lovechild of Kevin Smith and Quentin Tarantino and somehow it's managed to get a cinema release instead of being smothered and lobbed into the Liffey as it should have been. It's a diabolical watch. The kind of trash that makes Fatal Deviation, Man About Dog and Charlie Casanova look like masterpieces in retrospect. Everyone involved in the making of this should be issued with a barring order from the High court stopping them from ever going near a film set again. It's the kind of movie that could legitimately ruin the Irish film industry if the wrong person saw it. If you're reading this and assuming I'm speaking in hyperbole please get yourself to the nearest Omniplex and let the horror wash over you.

Every aspect of this film is septic. The electric pink font used as titles. The static camera that makes the Angelus look like a Fast & Furious film. The subplots that pop up and go absolutely nowhere. The godawful delivery of some of the worst dialogue you'll ever hear and the abundance of hateful characters on display. The mind boggles at the decision to release this. We've seen 15 second instagram stories with more imagination and talent on display. Then there's Dillon. Dillon is a piece of shit. If you came across Dillon bleeding on the side of the road during a night out you'd kick him and continue on your way without a care in the world. Dillon is misogyny personified and the fact that he's played for laughs would make you really question the mindset of both the person who wrote his lines and the person playing the part. Both were John Sweeney btw and if I never seen him in another film I'll be happy.

Most people will make it through life without knowing this piece of shit exists. That's the way it should be. It will do nothing but ruin your day. Avoid this like the plague. It's bad for your health.

11 new shows to keep an eye out for

If you love TV you gotta love the Autumn. The time of year when all your fave shows come back along with a torrent (arf) of new stuff too. There's always way too much to keep up with but here's 11 that might hit the spot. Some of these will no doubt turn up on Irish and UK TV, some will be on Netflix and others.....well, it's up to you to figure out how to watch them. Cough.

Wu-Tang : An American Saga

This one has already started. All about the beginnings of the Wu-Tang Clan, New York's biggest rap collective. If you've any interest in the world of hip hop this one will suit you. Loads of new faces here and some wicked tunes. Ashton Sanders as RZA is excellent.

Dublin Murders

This RTE/BBC production based on Tania French's novels see two detectives delving into a pair of murders during the Celtic tiger era. This looks like it's going to be a cracker and a great Irish cast including Killian Scott and Sarah Greene should make it shine.

Unbelievable (Netflix)

A young woman's "lie" rapidly spins out of control. Two detectives come to investigate and find the truth is all over the place. This one could prove to be the water cooler show of Autumn. It's cast of Toni Collette, Merritt Wever, and Kaitlyn Dever definitely makes it one to try anyway.

Emergence

A new scifi show with an interesting premise and an X-Files vibe about a child found near the site of a UFO crash. Alison Tolman and Donald Faison are always good but Terry O'Quinn being in it makes it a must watch for genre fans.

Evil

A psychologist and a priest investigate spooky stuff. If you like the show Supernatural (which is wrapping up this year) this could be the new one for you. Fans of Luke Cage and Mike Colter will jump on this.

The Unicorn

Walton Goggins (always brilliant) plays a newly widowed father who finds himself the most desired fella in town. This comedy could have legs. Goggins is good at everything. Now hopefully Rob Corddry will be killed off in the first episode and it will be perfect.

The Godfather Of Harlem

This one is going to be excellent. The story of Bumpy Johnson. The African American gangster who took on the New York mob in the 60's for control of the drug trade. Forrest Whitaker is the main man. This could be the new crime show we're all talking about.

Darklands

Virgin Media One's new crime drama could be the next Love/Hate. Coming from the makers of Cardboard Gangsters there's a good chance of it anyway. The story of a teenage boy in Bray dipping his toes into the world of crime. This one will be rough.

Mrs Fletcher

Eve And Brendan. Mother and Son. Brendan goes to college and Eve decides to shake things up. Brendan decides to go his own way too. Kathryn Hahn is in this. Kathryn Hahn is brilliant. Guaranteed fun.

The Mandalorian

The new Star Wars TV show. Some will groan but others (like me) will be giddy as hell. The story of a Boba Fett like bounty hunter in the years between Return Of The Jedi and The Force Awakens. Pedro Pascal leads an amazing cast. Only available on Disney + though....

Watchmen

In an alternate 80's superheroes exist but they aren't particularly super. This TV show adapts the famous Alan Moore comic book and hopefully does it better than the messy 2007 film. It's being made by HBO so there's a good chance it will be quality. Serious cast in this too led by Jeremy Irons.

Spiders are bastards

Like clockwork they arrive at the start of Septemer. The 8 legged bastards. Hairy little fuckers from the bowels of hell that insist on invading our homes come autumn.

I hate them.

I hate being on edge in my own home. The fear everytime you enter a room. The dread of seeing one climbing the wall above your bed and looking at you pure nonchalantly as you cower in fear in your own safe space. Not being able to open a window in case one comes in to get you. And yes, they do come for us. They definitely aren't more scared of us than we are of them. The malevolent little shits.

They are demonic emissaries of hell.

Every year they get bigger too. Last year i threw a shoe at one and it not only survived the blow but scuttled away afterwards. I swear I heard it laugh at me too.

September 2025

It's the scuttling that gets me. It's unnatural. Animals shouldn't be able to move sideways. You never know where they'll go. And they always go where you can't get to them. Smart little hooers. They do it knowing you won't be able to relax. When they go under your bed and vanish is the worst cos it means a night on the couch.

How can something so minute ruin your day so easily.

Oh i hate them. Don't be coming at me with the whole "They keep insects out of your gaff" nonsense. They'd go in my room 101. The world would be a better place without them.

Arachnid pricks.

The Banana Splits Movie

If you're of a certain vintage you might remember the Banana Splits, an American puppet show that used to pop up on English TV on Saturday mornings a long time ago. It had THE most annoying theme tune in the world and it made Barney look like University Challenge but it was undemanding fun and sure what else would you want when you're 8 years old. The news of a Banana Splits movie with a horror twist coming out piqued my interest. I knew it would be fun. I had no idea it would be so gory.

Oh it's so gory.

Fleegle, Bingo, Drooper and Snorky are the Banana Splits. Animatronic puppets adored by kids. One such kid is Harley Williams (Finlay Wotjak-Hissong) and for his birthday his mam Beth (Dani Kind) has gotten him tickets to a live taping of one of their shows. Him, Beth, his brother Austin and their shitbag step dad Mitch all head along expecting an hour of fun but what they get is a puppet fueled massacre that will change their lives FOREVER.

Whoever wrote this loves 80's horror, specifically slasher movies. The DNA of Friday The 13th, The Burning, Madman, Rosemary's Killer and Halloween et al is spattered all over The Banana Splits Movie and if you're a fan of the genre it's not a bad thing at all. If not your eyes will roll right out of your head at the plot contrivances and extreme cliche on display here. Everything you'd expect to see in a ropey horror gets rolled out. Characters heading off into the dark by themselves. Dead bodies popping up out of the blue while defying the laws of physics. Characters you want to see minced as soon as they open their mouths and the worst one, knowing exactly who will live and who will die. It's all here and you'll groan every single time.

And yet for all it's downsides it's just a big ol' pile of fun. There's an awful lot of pleasure to be gained from seeing evil puppets dismembering and bludgeoning the worst sections of society. Instagrammers who insists on livesharing every moment of their lives. Parents forcing their own failed dreams on their kids. Bullies who treat their staff and families like shit. Watching them getting set on fire and asphyxiating on novelty lollipops never gets old. I'm sure that probably paints me in an awful like but as Brendan Grace once said "I've had my fun and that's all that matters."

It's the takeaway food of movies. You'll enjoy it while you devour it but an hour later you'll have it all forgotten. Harley and Beth aside every other character blends into one. They exist to get turned into ketchup. There's no bit of depth here at all. Nothing unique. Nothing memorable. It lives in the moment. But if you like your splatter with a side order of dark giggles you might get a kick out of this. If not avoid it because it might ruin your Hanna-Barbera tainted childhood memories forever.

11 films on TV this week that are worth your time.

The Thing   Sat   7/9   The Horror Channel @ 21.00

The men of a research station in Antartica finds things getting very strange when a huskie arrives at their camp followed by the chopper that's been chasing it. John Carpenter's scifi/horror is a masterpiece of tension, paranoia and amazing practical special effects that 37 years later still put CGI to shame. Kurt Russell, Keith David, Donald Moffat and Wilford Brimley lead a cast that's second to none.

Jackie   Sat   7/9   RTE1 @ 22.10

Jackie Kennedy finds her dream of Camelot shattered on a November Day in Dallas and it's everything she can do to stay upright afterwards. Natalie Portman is on fire as the personification of dignity in the aftermath of trauma. Not a watch for everyone but it's impeccable filmmaking. Peter Sarsgaard, Greta Gerwig, Billy Crudup and the magnificent John Hurt (in his last non posthumous performance) all do powerful work.

In The Loop   Sat   7/9   BBC2 @ 23.30

It's all kicking off in the middle east and UK and US spin doctors are trying to prevent a war. But humans have a wee tendency to make mistakes..... This spin off of the TV show In The Thick of It is a joy, a profane and nasty joy. If you've seen the show you'll enjoy this more but if not there's still loads here to laugh at including a brilliant turn from James Gandolfini. Peter Capaldi is deadly as always.

Magnum Force   Sun   8/9   ITV4 @ 21.00

Harry Callaghan is back and this time he's investigating a series of vigilante killings in and around San Francisco. But there's something off about the murders. The second film in the Dirty Harry series is definitely the best of the lot and one that makes fun of itself while tearing down the fascist tone of the original film. Clint Eastwood rocks it as always and that funky Lalo Schifrin score ties it all together perfectly.

The Life And Death Of Colonel Blimp   Mon   9/9   BBC2 @ 14.05

Clive Candy has had hell of a life and we get to bear witness to how it all plays out from the Boer War to WW2 and meet all the people who shaped him along the way. This Powell and Pressburger film from 1943 is masterful and more than transcends it's original purpose as wartime propaganda. A warm, witty, upsetting and layered watch powered by super turns from Roger Livesey & Deborah Kerr times three. Yup (x) 3.

This Must Be The Place   Mon   9/9   TG4 @ 21.30

Cheyenne is an ex rock star living out his retirement in Dublin. He's a man haunted by his past and when he attends his father's funeral he finds out his father has lived through similar. This starts off as a character piece and ends up as a road trip one. It's an odd watch but a very interesting one that's driven by an immense performance from a very different Sean Penn. Keep an eye out for Eve Hewson (lil Bono) in her major debut role.

The Broken Circle Breakdown   Tues   10/9   Film4 @ 01.35

Didier and Elise are in love despite being as different as oil and water. All that has to be put aside when the spectre of illness raises it's head in their little family. Excellent music and haunting acting combine here to make a film that will make you smile and then floor you. Belgian actors Veerle Baetens & Johan Heldenbergh are sublime in their parts. Make sure you are in the right headspace if you decide to watch this one.

The Misfits   Thur   12/9   Film4 @ 12.40

Gay is a washed up cowboy eking out an existence in Nevada. Rosalyn is a depressed divorcee. They are not a match made in heaven. This 1961 John Huston film is a tough watch but fantastic performances from Clark Gable, who was dying as this was filming, and Marilyn Monroe, who was in the depths of pill addiction, turn it into something very compelling. A nice supporting turn from Eli Wallach adds to it all.

The Searchers   Fri   13/9   TCM @ 13.30

John Wayne plays Ethan Edwards, a man searching for years for his niece who has been kidnapped by a Comanche war party. But what are his intentions? A gorgeous looking and highly influential western (one shot of Wayne framed by a doorway has been homaged in dozens of films and shows), well acted by all especially Wayne and Vera Miles. One of the finest, most thoughtful westerns ever made

A Late Quartet   Fri   13/9   BBC2 @ 23.45

A classical music quartet is upset when a medical diagnosis is announced and repressed resentments bubble to the surface and threaten their future. Catherine Keener, Christopher Walken, Imogen Poots and the late and much missed Philip Seymour Hoffman headline this wonderfully acted tale of friendship and human weakness. Plus the music is as good as you'd expect.

Jagged Edge   Fri   13/9   RTE1 @ 23

 A woman is murdered and her husband finds himself the main suspect despite proclaiming himself innocent. A modern day film noir starring the always reliable Jeff Bridges and Glenn Close as the lawyer who defends him in court plus Robert Loggia who's very entertaining in a supporting role. A scary, tense and twisty thriller that mightn't keep you guessing but you'll certainly be stuck to it. Perfect late night viewing.

It : Chapter 2

It : Chapter 2 opens with two gay men walking away from a carnival after being on the receiving end of a homophobic insult. The bigots follow them and on a darkened bridge brutally assault them both while spewing invective and then throw one of them over the edge into the river below. It's an incident that's sadly still replayed on a daily basis in towns and cities all over the world. A terrifying moment of brutal realism that puts the supernatural scares that come later in the ha'penny place. It sets the tone for a darker, harsher sequel that doesn't live up to the success of it's predecessor but it comes pretty close.

2016. 27 years after the events of 1989. Pennywise the clown is back and the children of Derry, Maine are in mortal danger. Mike Hanlon sets out of bring the Loser gang back to where it all began. At the end of the 80's they banded together and defeated evil and now they'll have to do it all again. Their memories of that fateful day have faded but as Richie, Bev, Bill, Ben and Eddie come home everything rushes back at them. Life has been good to some and bad to others and it's going to take every ounce of strength they have to defeat the source of their worst nightmares.

It : Chapter 2 is 169 minutes long. It's a ridiculously overindulgent running time considering it's the second part of a story and if you've seen the 1990 mini-series you'll know exactly how it's going to play out despite all the padding. But it's so successful in it's casting that you'll be very willing to forgive it's longueurs. The younger cast from the first film appears in flashback through but this time around it's the adults in charge and they all hit the nail on the head. Jessica Chastain (Bev), James Ransone (Eddie), Bill Hader (Richie) sink into their parts effortlessly. The physical resemblances are good but they just become the characters from the first movie except a bit more decrepit.... well not Jessica of course.

And because they become characters we've already met you actually give a shit about them and that, for me, is one of the keys to a successful horror movie. They aren't just fodder for the Pennywise grinder. You feel bad when they get hurt, you feel scared when they are facing something horrifying. You don't want them to die and the tension is mighty when you think they will. It : Chapter 2 is laced with tense scenes but not many scary ones. It still carries that sense of creeping dread from the first film but lacks the all out scary vibe it had and it's successful jump scares are few and far between. There's nothing here like the home projector moment in the first movie but one small nod to a very famous John Carpenter film works like gangbusters and will freak out the more arachnophobic amongst us. (Like me!)

That running time though. It's going to be an issue for a lot of people. The opening third motors along. The gang arrive and meet up in a great scene and then the filler starts to appear. There's stuff in the middle and especially the last third that should never have made it past the editor's scissors. Visits to old ladies. The Henry Bowers subplot that totally fizzles out. Watery basements. Interminable headbutting. Moments designed to scare but that really add nothing but repetition and more running time. It's annoying. Had director Andy Muschietti been stricter with himself he could have turned out a film almost the equal of his first entry into Stephen King land (King himself has a fun cameo too btw) because the first film's themes of alienation, childhood terror and social rot are still present and that's why, along with the cast, it's successful despite it's length. The monsters in the best horror movies were always a proxy for the real life horrors of the day and that's what Pennywise really is. He's homophobia, he's racism, he's hate, he's intolerance, he's everything wrong with the modern world wrapped up in a manky red wig and a load of make up.

I've seen 5 star reviews for this and I've seen 1 star reviews. Can't agree with either. I'd place it on the higher side of 3 stars. It's not as good and definitely not as scary as the first entry but a magnificent cast and a nicely maintained sense of disquiet turn it into a solid watch.

The Mustang

The prison movie. A staple of cinema since cinema began. I Am A Fugitive From A Chain Gang. Brute Force. The Great Escape. The Hill. The Big Doll House. Papillon. Escape From Alcatraz. Midnight Express. Scum. Barbed Wire Dolls. Lock Up. In The Name Of The Father. A little known movie called The Shawshank something or other and so on and so forth. There's been 100's of them. You always know what to expect. Terror, claustrophobia, the spectre of sexual assault, drugs, tattoos, VI-O-LENCE. What we rarely see in a prison film is redemption. Hope is a rare thing. Hence....The Mustang.

Roman Coleman has been locked up in a Nevada jail for years. Unlike so many other prison movie inmates he's guilty and he knows it and he wants to do his time because he knows he's no good for people. His rage is building and with no outlet it's only a matter of time before he explodes. His prison psychologist gets him into a program that tames wild mustang horses so they can be sold at auction. Roman is skeptical at first and lashes out in the only way he knows but soon enough things start to fall into place. Prison life though, prison life is shitty...

That's art 

I thought this was excellent. Laure de Clermont-Tonnerre's second feature is a touching and in places quite beautiful look at a man with no place in the world who finally makes the connection he's craved all his life in the last place he ever expected. The scenes between man and beast offer a warmth rarely if ever seen in this genre and.......wait a minute.....Touching? Beautiful?? Warmth??? In a prison movie???? Yup. Now i wouldn't call this a feelgood movie by any stretch of the imagination but there's a positivity here and an optimism that just feels refreshing as hell. It's rare to watch a prison film that treats it's cast like genuine people and not caged, prowling animals waiting to strike. It's prisoners are (mostly) people who made silly, split second decisions and who want to be better but circumstances rarely let them achieve this.

It's these circumstances that take some bit of the shine off The Mustang. A subplot about drug dealing and gangs facing off over racial lines is one that's been done to death and here it feels almost shoehorned in to please the people who'll watch this expecting violent shenanigans. Annoyingly this subplot doesn't even get played out to it's conclusion and is left hanging but thankfully there's enough goodness going on elsewhere that we can overlook it. Plus Josh Stewart always does well in a bad bastard role so I won't complain much.

Belgian actor Matthias Schoenaerts puts in a massive shift as Roman. Both menacing and robotic at first and it's a joy watching his new interest chip away at the protective coating he's built around himself. Friendship, intimacy and even bonds are built until a startling moment near the end sees all his walls crumble. It's troubling, heartbreaking stuff that will no doubt be overlooked during award season. Jason Mitchell as a fellow inmate called Henry is likable as always and it is great seeing Bruce Dern back in the cowboy setting where his career started all those years ago.

The Mustang is well worth going to see in the cinema if you can. It's a lot different to what it's trailers are making it out to be and it's nice to leave the cinema feeling uplifted for a change.

Fave films of the century so far - 2000 - The Way Of The Gun

Imagine Butch Cassidy & The Sundance Kid were around today. Now imagine if they were scumbags. Now you have Parker (Ryan Philippe) and Longbaugh (Benicio Del Toro). A horrible pair of amoral bastards who'll happily kidnap and ransom a pregnant woman, Robin (Juliette Lewis) if they can make money from her.

Sounds horrible right? Wrong. It's the story of The Way Of The Gun and it's amazing. The best film of 2000 and hardly anyone has seen it.

The opening scene.

Film openings don't come much better than that. Yes i know it's filled with misogyny and homophobia but good jesus it grabs you and doesn't let go. Our "heroes" are filth. Unapologetic filth. They never soften throughout and yet somehow you find yourself siding with them because brilliantly the fellows they are up against are even worse. In fact every one here is a piece of work. Everyone. James Caan's bagman brokering the ransom is Parker gone to seed. Taye Diggs as a robotic bodyguard fully committed to saving an unborn baby and not the mother. Scott Wilson as the business man father to Robin's child who sees her as nothing more than a commodity and Lewis as Robin is as we find out, far from the innocent she seems. Everyone we meet is dodgy. Everyone. There's more shades of gray here than in a Dulux catalogue.

It's a 2000 film but it's soul is in the 70's. It's best scene is two men quietly talking in a bar. It's the kind of movie Sam Peckinpah should have had his hands all over. It's a film that's not afraid to assault your senses. It's a story about bad men and the horrible things they do but laced with the modern sensibility of director Christopher McQuarrie. It was released 19 years ago to meh reviews but it's worth revisiting. Time has been very kind to it and star Ryan Philippe has never been better.

The Informer

There's a scene in The Informer where our hero comes up with a life changing plan in moments. The type of life changing plan that entire films (and an entire tv series tbh) have been based around but here it happens in the blink of an eye. If you can get past the stupidity of the moment you'll enjoy The Informer. If not then maybe this isn't for you.

Pete Koslow (Joel Kinnaman) is a former soldier who made a massive mistake and spent time in prison for it. Now he's an FBI informant in New York City trying to build a case with his handlers (Rosamund Pike & Clive Owen) against the Polish mafia. While undercover a death occurs and so as not to blow his criminal persona he allows himself to be manipulated by both sides of the law. Of course everything goes pear-shaped and Pete and his family find themselves literally fighting for their lives.

The Informer is a very silly film. But happily it's also crunchy and profane fun. The type of 80's & 90's throwback that rarely hits the big screen anymore. It's main cast consists of actors who aren't famous enough to be guaranteed a free ride to the closing credits and this adds a degree of tension to proceedings that wouldn't exist had the cast been A-list. It's always good to watch something and never be quite sure what's going to happen. In this age of safe, bloodless multiplex fodder it's a nice feeling to be left on edge. The Informer's prison scenes will definitely have you gnawing your knuckles with it's depiction of the slammer as a terrifyingly claustrophobic, violence filled hell hole.

It's a 2hr film but there's an awful lot going on here. So much so that a little bit of streamlining would have been very welcome. Two characters with loads of potential, one on either side of the law, turn up and then vanish and maybe the movie might have moved along better without them. Ireland's Ruth Bradley is one and while it's a treat to hear her rocking a pretty convincing Noo Yawk twang it's annoying when she just disappears. Other cast members fair better. Joel Kinnaman is convincingly gruff and physical as the ex-con seeking redemption and Common's driven NYC cop Grens is the type of character who could easily carry a film on his own. He's an actor who always adds an interesting energy to a role.

The Informer is a grand way to pass two hours. You'll must likely have it forgotten a few days after you watch it but you'll enjoy yourself while it's on. BTW, if you have a problem with ears you should avoid this. Like the plague. YEEESH.

Holidays

So long, farewell, auf wiedersehen, adieu.

Never Grow Old

Garlow is a frontier town under the control of Preacher Pike (Danny Webb in full on fire and brimstone mode) and his debauchery hating iron fist. The townsfolk earn a living in the mud and their only respite is their Sunday hymn. Patrick Tate (Emil Hirsch, in real life a horrid little shit), an Irish immigrant, is the town undertaker and he wants more for his family than this life of misery. Then one day an outlaw by the name of Dutch Albert (John Cusack) rides into town and Patrick realises that things are about to be a lot worse.

My god, this was an astoundingly dark watch. Thousands of westerns have portrayed the hardship of life on the edge of civilisation but few of them as successfully as this. The sunny, dusty streets of Tombstone, Laredo and Cheyenne are nowhere to be seen here. What we get is sadness and mud and plenty of it. Menace abounds too. It was a violent, often short lived existence. In a land with no law, psychopaths prowled and pounced upon the unsuspecting and Never Grow Old depicts this with a sense of foreboding that starts with the opening title scene and doesn't let up until the end. It makes for gripping viewing but good jaysus it's exhausting.

The source of this menace is Dutch Albert. A terrifying, nearly demonic presence underplayed brilliantly by John Cusack who's as good here as he's been in years. Cusack, that hero of 80s and 90's cinema, seemed to have given up trying in the past decade (aside from the superb Love & Mercy) so it's nice to see him back in form, even if it is in one of the nastiest bad guy roles of recent memory. You'll shudder every time he opens his mouth and every time he appears the tension hanging in the air will fold you over. Emile Hirsch as Patrick pulls off a surprisingly well done Irish accent but Cusack is the one you'll remember here. Déborah François as Patrick's wife isn't the shrinking violet usually seen in westerns either. Her French Audrey Tate is a fiery soul who's well capable to dealing with what life throws at her.

One thing good westerns have always done is to take present day events and contextualise them into a genre setting. In 2019 we're in the darkest timeline and 1850's Garlow reflects that. Neither era was good to the women of its time. Both are plighted by bully boy religious tactics and terrifying leaders acting like wannabe demigods. Both have people grasping for little beacons of hope in the darkness, both seem to consist of never ending doom. Not much has changed in 170 years, bad men still prey on the weak, people are still gunned down in the streets. We just have WiFi and avocado toast now. Never Grow Old is the story of people who went to America in search of a better life, in search of that famous dream. Then they realised they'd been sold a dud. Sound familiar?

Irish director Ivan Kavanagh's first film in 5 years is a grand way to re-emerge on the scene. His love of the western genre is evident and the whole enterprise has a dark ring of truth to it that is sometimes missing in larger productions. It's darkness will be off-putting to a lot of viewers though. One subplot about a peripheral character is terribly distressing and comes to a climax in a scene that will make a lot of people tune out. But if you can stomach the despair there is a lot to appreciate here.

In selected cinemas now.