Tyrion is awake. He's survived the Battle Of Blackwater. He's badly scarred but he's alive. Stannis has been beaten and King's Landing is still standing. He's also lost his position as hand of the King due to his standing up to Joffrey.
Joffrey is king but with Tywin Lannister back there's no doubting who's in charge. Tywin is now hand of the king and making the most of it.
Littlefinger (ugh) is the man behind the joining of the Lannister's and Tyrell's. For this he gets Harrenhal. His taste for power is building and building. The Tyrell's also see this as a chance to grab power. Margaery makes her play for Joffrey. He looks willing. What of Sansa though? Cersei thinks it's a good idea too and Sansa is thrown aside.
Sansa is secretly delighted but Littlefinger warns her she's not safe yet. He promises to help her. DONT TRUST HIM SANSA.
Varys isn't happy with this latest turn of events and goes to Ros who works for Littlefinger to turn her against him. Ros is King's Landing's most prolific whore and privy to the secrets of powerful men.
Brienne is still on the way to King's Landing with Jaime. Jaime is still being an asshole to her naturally. Along the way they've a run in with Stark men who go for Jaime but who she butchers. Jaime is surprised but Brienne isn't loyal to the Starks, only Catelyn.
Jaime's impressed by her shades of gray but he'd never tell her that. He's way too much of a shithead.
Catelyn is disappointed with Robb. She knows he's with Talisa but he's breaking her promise to marry him to Walder Frey's daughter. Frey is a man you don't disappoint.
In Dragonstone Stannis is mightily pissed off. He's a man who can't bear losing and he's taking it out on his witch Melisandre. Her magic failed him. He's lost all his men and believing her visions was the ruin of him. He killed his brother Renly for this.
To restore his faith in her she gives him a vision of the lord of light. Apparently looking into a load of burning coal does wonders in the world of dark magic. Stannis is a believer again.
In Winterfell Theon is still holding court despite being surrounded by an army led by Roose Bolton's son Ramsay. Maester Luwin suggests joining the Night's Watch but Theon is way too sappy for that. He decides to fight for what he's taken. The fool.
Theon may want to take on the Boltons but his men think it's suicide. They want to go hon. They knock him out and escape. Even after he's taken Winterfell no one takes him seriously. On the way out Luwen tries to intervene and ends up with a knife in his guts.
Varys lets slip to Tyrion that the Lannister soldier who attacked him did so on Cersei's orders. Tyrion might have no love for his sister but this is still devastating to hear. He might have lead the attack on Stannis's men but he'll never get any credit for it. People know what he did but that won't heal his scars, inside or out.
He tries to get Shae to leave him, to not to have to look at his scarred face. She's having none of it. She's loyal and in love. Fair play to her. Their relationship is one of the untainted things in this show.
She wants him to leave with her. To run away, to be happy. But he's still a Lannister and Lannister's don't run
Another untainted relationship comes together in the Westerlands as Robb and Talisa get married in secret. Oh man, I've a bad feeling about this. But fuck it, they're happy. this show needs more happiness.
In Qarth Daenerys and Jorah are heading to the house of the undying to retrieve her dragons. It's a weird looking place that will no doubt get weirder inside. Man alive her entire story is just padding this year.
Arya, Gendry and Hotpie are on the move and being tracked by Jaqen Hagar. This fella is magic and can sense something special in Arya. She wants to be like him and he informs her all her answers are in Bravos. She needs to find her family first but he gives her a coin that will grant her passage to Bravos when the time comes.
In Winterfell Bran, Rickon, Osha and Hodor realise the Ironborn are gone and come out of hiding only to find their home burned and Maester Luwen dying. The only creatures left are the direwolves.
Luwen knows he's a goner and persuades the foursome to go north to the wall where Jon will protect them. Anything is better than the south. Luwen persuades Osha is finish him off. I'll miss that guy. He was cool.
They've a long journey ahead of them now. I hope it's a safe one.
In the House of the undying things get weird fast. Daenerys has visions of the Iron throne and haunted forests beyond the wall. Places she's never been.Things are getting creepy. It's a glimpse into her future.
She also has visions of the dead Drogo and her stillborn son Rhaego. Both are happy in the afterlife together. This vision brings her peace and also leads her to her captured dragons.
Phat Phee, the magician who captured the dragons tries to capture her but her dragons burn him to dust. No one fucks with their mother. Why do people keep underestimating Daenerys? She has dragons!!!
In the North Jon ad Qhorin are being marched towards Mance Rayder. Qhorin knows he's a dead man so sacrifices himself to make Jon's switch to the side of the Wildlings look realistic.
With him dead Jon has gained the trust of the wildlings and they show him exactly how powerful their forces are. Jon though has just killed a fellow Night's Watch man and is slightly dazed by events. Ygritte believes in him now too and soon so will Mance Rayder.
In Qarth Daenerys then discovers Xaro Xhoan Daxos and her own handmaiden Doreah had a hand in her betrayal too. She deals with them mercilessly. Then loots his house to buy a ship for the next part of her adventure.
In the North Sam and the rest of the Night's watch are about to witness something terrifying. They hear a three horned blast of noise. A warning that hasn't been heard in a thousand years. A warning that White Walkers are coming.
The Night's watch men flee but Sam is left behind. He hasn't a hope. He can't fight and he can't run. He's no threat and the army of White Walkers that stumble by him like frozen zombies know that.
Their leader is a demonic presence on a dead horse. A terrifying enemy leading the charge south. A charge of thousands. Hundreds of thousands.
Now that was a fine way to end an OK season. Still mostly people moving from place to place but we finally get a glimpse of the terrifying future of Westoros. Season 3 is going to be good.
Next up - Valar Dohaeris
Series 1 - 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10
Series 2 - 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9
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