Boogie Nights Sat 27/2 TG4 @ 21.30
Dirk has a gift and porn director Jack Horner wants to share it with the world. He finds a new & accepting family in the world of adult entertainment. Things are grand for a while, but it's the 80's and coke is everywhere... Paul Thomas Anderson's sophomore movie is still his best. An epic look at the seamier side of Tinseltown powered by a brilliant cast including Mark Wahlberg, Julianne Moore, Burt Reynolds and the much missed Philip Seymour Hoffman.
Apocalypse Now : Final Cut Sat 27/2 BBC2 @ 23.00
Captain Willard has been tasked with going up the Mekon River to terminate a rogue American Colonel with extreme prejudice. What he sees on his journey with stay with him and you forever. Apocalypse Now is a nightmarish, drug fueled masterpiece. A harrowing, troubling, hilarious & psychotic look into the dark troubling heart of man. If you haven't seen it yet I'm very jealous. Martin Sheen, Marlon Brando, Larry Fishburne, Robert Duvall, Frederic Forrest and Dennis Hopper will all amaze you.
The Cotton Club Sat 27/2 Talking Pictures TV @ 23.50
The Cotton Club of 1920's Harlem was the place to be. Brimming with stars rubbing elbows with gangster, it's where dreams were made and Dixie Dwyer is providing the music, He also has his eye on the girlfriend of Dutch Schultz. Francis Ford Coppola's gangster drama is a messy affair but it's so full of fizz and energy that you won't care. Richard Gere, Diane Lane, Nicolas Cage and a scary James Remar lead a wicked cast.
Scanners Sun 28/2 The Horror Channel @ 00.50
David Cronenberg's 1981 sci-fi/horror/thriller is an excellent example of the body horror genre. It stars Stephen Lack and Michael Ironside as two men who have dangerous psychic powers. One is on the run from society and the other wants to dominate it. An intriguing and blackly comic watch that contains some special effects that beat modern CGI hands down. The infamous scene near the start will literally blow your mind. Not for the squeamish.
This Beautiful Fantastic Sun 28/2 BBC2 @ 14.35
Now for a nice Sunday afternoon movie. Bella's a wannabe writer struggling to finish her book for children. Her obsessiveness about things and an awkward rental condition are making things difficult though. If you've seen the French film Amelie you might sense a similar vibe here but since when is that a bad thing. A light, diverting slice of whimsy. Jessica Findlay Brown, Tom Wilkinson and Ireland's own Andrew Scott all do well here.
The Man Who Would Be King Sun 28/2 RTE1 @ 15.20
Daniel and Peachy are two English soldiers in India. They've had enough of having nothing and decide to set off in search of riches. This adaption of a Rudyard Kipling novel is an enjoyable affair. It's old fashioned stuff but it's pure & utter escapism. A perfect watch for a lazy Sunday afternoon. Sean Connery and Michael Caine have a whale of a time as the leads. The late Christopher Plummer pops up as Kipling himself too.
Secrets & Lies Mon 1/3 Film4 @ 00.55
When her adoptive mother passes away Hortense decides to do what she's been putting off for years and delves into the past, looking for the woman who brought her into the world. That woman is Cynthia and Cynthia hasn't a clue what's about to hit her. Mike Leigh's 1996 drama is a beautifully human watch about our strengths and weaknesses and our abilities to be cruel and yet so loving. Marianne Jean- Baptiste, Brenda Blethyn and Timothy Spall are all astounding here.
The King Of Comedy Mon 1/3 TCM @ 23.55
Rupert Pupkin is a wannabe comic going to extreme lengths to achieve success. Lengths that involve a star comedian who wants nothing to do with him. This is one of Martin Scorsese and Robert De Niro's finest collaborations and a film you will watch through your fingers while trying not to die from cringing. It's a painfully superb black comedy. But you'll need to be in the right mood to enjoy it. Sandra Bernhard and a nasty Jerry Lewis do mighty work in support.
Nico, 1988 Tues 2/3 Film4 @ 01.20
Christa Päffgen a.k.a Nico was a German singer best known for her work with Lou Reed and The Velvet Underground. She was a problematic woman who had what you could call a troubled existence and this is the story of the last year of her life. It's tough and upsetting watch as you'll see but it's carried along by a graceful & in places mesmerising performance from Trine Dyrholm as Nico.
8 Mile Tues 2/3 ITV4 @ 23.15
Detroit, 2002, a kip. There's only one way out of the misery and the soul crushing work; Jimmy Rabbit knows it, he has the words but will he have the guts to use them. Curtis Hanson's dark drama is brought to life by a surprising turn from Eminem and it's rap battle sequences will electrify you for days afterwards. The supporting cast of Anthony Mackey, Kim Basinger and the late Brittany Murphy do solid work also.
The Friends Of Eddie Coyle Thur 4/3 Talking Pictures TV @ 01.15
A career criminal's lifetime of offences is about to catch up with him and a long jail sentence is in his future. But Eddie can't face jail and so starts doing something about it. Something very dangerous for a man in his line of work. A prime example of 70's crime cinema here, nasty, biting, ironic and effortlessly carried by Robert Mitchum in a part that feels quite different for him. Peter Boyle is aces as one of the titular friends.
Premium Rush Thur 4/3 Sony Movies @ 01.35
The world of Manhattan bike couriers is an exciting and potentially life threatening place that sees them risking life and limb everyday to get their packages to their destinations on time. One day Wiley finds himself carrying something rather valuable and other parties want it too. This film is so much fun, bouncing well shot and executed action scenes off you in a manner that will leave you breathless and giggling. Joseph Gordon- Levitt, Daria Ramirez and Michael Shannon all have a good time here.
Battle Of The Sexes Thur 4/3 Film4 @ 22.45
The eternal question. Who's better? Men or women? Watch this and find out. It's 1973 and there's about to be a tennis match between world number one Billie Jean King and ex champ Bobby Riggs that will answer all. An intriguing watch that will make you laugh and then anger you with it's depiction of the double standards, sexism and misogyny that was...and still is endemic in sport. Emma Stone and Steve Carell do great work as the leads.
Cardboard Gangsters Fri 5/3 Virgin Media One @ 21.30
Four young men with dillusions of grandeur decide to try and take over the drug trade in Darndale. But the existing dealers don't suffer newcomers gladly. Mark O'Connor's Dublin set thriller is vicious stuff. A terrifying,tense and unforgiving look at the underbelly of modern day Ireland. John Connors headlines the film and gives an immense performance full of so much rage you can feel him pulsating off the screen.
You Were Never Really Here Fri 5/3 Film4 @23.20
Joe's a traumatised war veteran haunted by what he saw and did overseas and now he's channeling his pain at bad men who deserve to face justice. People hire him to do his thing and he does it properly. Until a politician enters the picture. Director Lynne Ramsey and star Joaquin Phoenix have made something special here, a film that could have been cheap, nasty and exploitative in lesser hands and turned it into a bleak but soulful look at the power of redemption.
Source Code Fri 5/3 BBC1 @ 23.55
A man wakes up in someone else's body on a train and finds out he has eight minutes to find a bomber on board before disaster strikes. Duncan Jones' 2011 sci-fi thriller is, after an initially confusing opening, very entertaining. It's silly but if you go with it you'll have a good time watching a well written and crafted film led by a fine performance from Jake Gyllenhal. Vera Farmiga, Jeffrey Wright & Michelle Monaghan all make their own mark too.
As always a retweet is appreciated if this guide is helpful or if you discovered something new. Thank you.
You've had a bad week. Your friends are acting the maggot and you're pissed off with them. You need to relax. And what better way is there to relax than a nice day at a spa. To ease your tensions you start off with a few minutes in the sauna. The steam surrounds you and your stresses melt away. God it's lovely. Just perfect. Then a shocking pain fills your being. Someone has stuck something sharp into your face. Then again and again and again and again. You hit the tiles and die watching the blood ebb from your shattered visage. Your relaxing day has just gone to shit courtesy of the Empty Man.
1995. 4 friends hiking in the mountain of Bhutan discover something unearthly in a cavern. It ruins them. 2018. Former police man James Lasombra (James Badge Dale) has had a dreadful year. Tragedy has taken everything he held dear and he's a shell of his former self. A neighbour, Nora (Marin Ireland ), who he's friendly with tells him her daughter Amanda (Sasha Frolova) has vanished and he uses his detecting skills to figure out what's happening. He finds whispers of something occult, something off, something eerie, an urban myth that the teenagers in town have stumbled onto. Then he hears of a cult built around that myth. Surely there's can't be any truth to a supernatural rumour. Can there?
At 137 minutes long The Empty Man is a good 30 minutes longer than most horror films released these days. There's a definite sag in the middle section when the story unfortunately broadens it's horizons by bringing in the kind of world building that a cynical person might say is laying the roots for a franchise. But I gotta say I liked this one. It's beautifully shot, that Bhutan prologue is a hell of an eyecatcher and there's some stunning imagery dotted throughout (that birdseye zoom in a map and a terrifying bonfire procession). It's well acted. James Badge Dale, a reliable actor in what ever he turns up in commits fully to the lead, ensuring things stay grounded no matter how batshit crazy the story gets. And best of all, it's mythos is spooky as hell. It's genuinely scary. A sad rarity in mainstream American horror.
I love a horror that eschews cheap jump scares and The Empty Man does just that. Instead it uses it's running time to build up a crawling, cumulative feeling of dread, dotting it's tension with well crafted moments of horror and some startling violence (it deserves it's 18 cert) until we get an ending that might remind scary movie fans of a couple of 20th century genre classics while doing it's own thing also. It's a climax that feels earned and it's great to see a horror film committing to it's story fully with no cheap cops outs or fake outs.
The Empty Man is available to rent at google movies now. It's long running time and it's disturbing imagery will be offputting to some but it's a decent chiller.
Even though I Care A Lot finishes with a scene we're all very very familiar with you won't care a jot. As the credits roll you'll be grinning with the knowledge that you've just watched one of the most entertaining films of the year (yes I know it's only February but this year is going to be a barren one film wise), about one of the worst pieces of shit to grace a film screen in an age. This one hits the sweet spot.
Marla Grayson (Rosamund Pike) is a dreadful person. A true predator who preys on the weakest in society. She's a con artist who's grift is convincing judges to let her take over guardianship of elderly people who she places in prison like assisted living facilities while selling off their homes and assets. Working together with her girlfriend Fran (Eiza González) and the doctors and home directors in her pocket her horrible business is building her a nice nest egg but when she's alerted to the presence of a potentially very successful cherry (elderly person with no kids or family) her money making antennae goes off big time. Her mark is Jennifer Patterson (Dianne Wiest) and within moments the bewildered woman is a prisoner with no way out. Marla's latest score is gonna be a hell of an earner for her. But little does she realise that Jennifer does actually have a son. A very dangerous one at that.
5 minutes into I Care A Lot you'll be burning with rage. 10 minutes into it you'll happily watch Marla burn. 15 minutes into it you'll be hooked. Rosamund Pike's Marla has you in her grasp. She's capitalism wrapped in skin and popped into a blonde bob. She's vicious, horrifying, totally devoid of anything resembling a moral. She looks human but she's not. Nothing gets in her way. Nothing phases her. To paraphrase her, she's a lion and everyone else is a lamb. Pike just nails the part. Ice cold and evil yet magnetic and charming. You should hate her but like Tony Soprano, Henry Hill, Walter White and so on, you can't look away from her. And importantly, like their films and shows, the story never condones what's she doing. But that doesn't mean it can't be amusing.
From the off you'd expect this to be a tough watch but the moment a bullet strikes an oxygen tank which ricochets off a wall into a gangster's chest you'll start grinning and you won't really stop. We get a story that goes to places you'll never expect, full of characters doing exactly the opposite of what they should do and that's dotted with scenes of both black and almost slapstick humour and then just to round it off, a car sequence so suspenseful you'll lose knuckles during it. Then when you think you've being spoiled enough we get asides about how America's obsession with money and men's disdain for successful women. Two themes that bluntly intertwine the story and then lash out at the end. There's loads going on here and all of it is good.
I Care A Lot is most definitely the Rosamund Pike show but the hearty back up she gets from a well seasoned cast all adds to the mix. From Isiah Whitlock Jr's easily fooled judge to Alicia Witt's hippocratic oath shattering MD to Chris Messina's slimy lawyer, there's no weak link. But it's Dianne Wiest and Peter Dinklage as her dangerous son that turn this from an entertaining thriller into an entertainly pulpy thriller. Watch Wiest's stoned cackle when she realises Marla's situation or Dinklage's simmering rage that turns his physical presence immense. His entry into the story should feel like a step into silliness but it gives everything a nice feeling of propulsion. It all just works. It's a thrilling watch.
I Care A Lot is streaming now on Amazon Prime. It's a very enjoyable look at the many ways the American dream has died on it's arse.
This is never not upsetting
When in 2021 I wonder?
Will James Bond get moved for a 5th time?
Will Disney cave and release Black Widow on Video on demand?
Will Top Gun 2 ever get a release at all?
Will anyone site through 4 hours of the jaysus Justice League again?
Will Warner Brothers release anything theatrically ever again?
Will that horrible looking new Ghostbusters film get lost?? (I hope so tbh)
Will we ever get to find out what happens when the Fast & Furious crew go to space?
Will that Sopranos film be as good as it sounds?
Will I get to lie back in my favourite place with a large popcorn and a blue slushie?
Christ I fucking hope so.
"To know death Otto, you have to fuck life in the gallbladder."
The notorious words spoken by Baron von Frankenstein after he's had an orgasmic grope around in the innards of the pieced together woman he's about to bring back to life. For British audiences raised on Hammer horror versions of Mary Shelley's gothic tale this one must have been mindblowing. Even 48 years after it was made Flesh For Frankenstein can be an eyebrow raiser for some.
First released in the cinema in 1975 this sex and gore filled twist on the tale had 8 minutes of blood, guts and sauciness cut from it by the BBFC before they concluded was fit for public consumption. 7 years later in the slightly more permissive 80's it was released again with 2 minutes snipped from it but still wound up on the nasties list when there was uproar about it's warped content. If you've seen it you won't be one bit surprised, especially when you hear it's plotline.
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| The Baron's O face |
Baron Von Frankenstein is a sexual deviant who likes to dabble in the darker side of science and has come up with a plan to create a race of slaves he can command. His evil scheme consists of creating a man and a woman, his sex zombies, pieced together from the best parts of dead bodies and then letting them mate to create his slaves. He's spending so much time experimenting and being turned on (yup) by his work that he's neglecting his marital duties to his randy wife Katrin (Monique van Vooren). In her frustrated state she has her eye on a farmhand called Nicholas (Joe Dallesandro) who likes to frequent the local town's brothel. Coincidentally Frankenstein has decided parts from a man who likes sex will finish off his male zombie nicely so goes to the same brothel. Annoyingly for him, he chooses Nicholas's friend Sacha (Srdjan Zelenovic) instead. Sacha's eye seems to be drawn more to Nicholas than any of the ladies of the night but that doesn't stop him from being decapitated by the Baron. With his friend missing Nicholas goes to work in the Baron's castle where part of his duties include servicing Katrin. And there he notices his friend.....who's acting rather strangely.
It's rather different to the version of the story we all know isn't it. Gone are the subtleties of Shelley's masterpiece and it's ethical and religious themes and in their place are amputations, decapitations, threesomes and disembowellments by the dozen. And because the film was originally released in 3D every gore scene makes sure that it's livers and intestines are hanging right into the camera. It sounds like a tough watch but it's extremely camp tone makes the whole thing very inoffensive. And combined with Udo Kier's brilliantly bizarre turn as the baron who loves nothing better than to molest a bladder or two you have a film that will have you laughing your arse off, mostly in disbelief at what you are watching.
But the BBFC of the early 80's under the eye of James Ferman didn't have much of a sense of humour and the film was prosecuted for obscenity by the director of public prosecutions ensuring it's place in the halls of cinematic infamy. IMO it doesn't deserve to be on the nasty list and never did but I can see why others would think so, especially back then. The grim sadism, real animal violence and sexual violence so beloved of the more cause célèbre nasties is nowhere to be seen here. It's not a film to be taken seriously at all. It's grand guignol cinema at it's silliest. At it's finest looking too. Director Paul Morrissey learned his trade working alongside the famed artist Andy Warhol in the late 1960's and his eye for composition and imagery has ensured this is one of the best looking nasties. It's one of the best all round nasties as well. By a mile.
And it's so much better than the next film on the video nasty list - the truly awful Forest Of Fear.
Films based on computer games tend to fall into two categories. Absolute crap or forgettable fun. Super Mario Bros? Crap. Tomb Raider? Forgettable fun. Assassin's Creed? Crap. Rampage? Forgettable fun. Far Cry & Max Payne? Craaaaaaaaap. Doom & Sonic The Hedgehog..... you can see where this is going. There's just something about the brilliance computer games are capable of that hasn't yet translated across to the silver screen. Which side will Paul W.S. Anderson's latest game to film adaption fall on? His previous Resident Evil films were all on the fun side which is always a good sign.
In the universe of Monster Hunter reality is split between the New World and the Real World. In the New World humans spend their time fighting and running from giant hungry beasts and in the Real World we pay taxes, eat cauliflower rice and have zoom quizzes. Which is more horrifying I hear you ask? Well the denizens of the New World can deal with their problems by shooting arrows at them at least. One such person is Hunter (Tony Jaa) who's been separated from his gang during a battle with the monsters roaming his land. While wandering the desert he sees a team of US army rangers led by Natalie Artemis (Milla Jovovich) emerging from a tear in the fabric between realities and instantly they are attacked and decimated by another monster. Now survivors from both sides have to team up to survive. Will that dark and stormy tower in the distance have any answers?
Yep. I know. It sounds thick as pigshit doesn't it. It's not a storyline that bears much thinking about but it's fun. And fun is what we need now. Big dollops of it. You don't come to a film called Monster Hunter looking for depth or subtlety do you? You come to see big monsters fucking people up and here you'll get your money's worth. Fancy a dragon taking on a helicopter? Look no further. Ever wanted to see yer man from Ong Bak jumping off a climb with a giant sword to kill a massive spider? You're in luck today. There's no Spielbergian hiding in the shadows here. No late reveals for budgetary reasons. From the off we we get gigantic monster after gigantic monster and it will have your inner child bouncing around you during it's well shot action scenes. Unless you're arachnophobic. In that case you're goosed, especially during a sweaty palmed cavern encounter that will leave you whimpering as you peep over the back of your couch.
But it's called Monster Hunter isn't it? What about the hunting? There's plenty of it and that's where things fall down. There's loads of fun to be had as Hunter and Natalie go through the tropes of first fighting and then bonding but at around the 70 minute mark a whole bunch of new hunters (yes game fans, Palico is there), led by Ron Perlman looking like a cross between his characters in A Quest For Fire & Beauty and the Beast, are introduced along with a big new lump of plot and everything threatens to go off the rails. It's too much story, all flying by in the blink of an eye in an attempt to give the film a franchise worthy ending. And when that ending comes it's hilariously blatant. The days of releasing a movie and seeing will it do well before announcing a follow up are well over.
This mash up of Kaiju action and The Dark Tower (with a fun nod to Two Mules For Sister Sara) is at it's best in it's first hour where it feels surprisingly faithful to the game series that spawned it before it wraps things up with a cynical and unmemorable ending. So it's fun & forgettable. Now we know which category Monster Hunter falls into.
Monster Hunter is streaming on US sites now. It may get a cinema release later in the year.
Stronger Sat 20/2 BBC2 @ 23.25
2013. Boston. Two brothers set off bombs at the city marathon and the day becomes a bloody mess. A woman called Erin, who was running sees it all happen and finds her boyfriend Jeff in the wreckage. A tough watch about the human cost of violence and the resilience needed to come back from it. Superb acting from Tatiana Maslany & Jake Gyllenhaal will keep you going through the horror.
Broken Flowers Sat 20/2 TG4 @ 23.30
Just after Don has had his heart broken, a blast from the past forces him out of his slump and on a roadtrip across America to engage with a part of his life he didn't even realise existed. Jim Jarmusch's low-key slowburn comedy dramas aren't for everyone but this one is a bittersweet and likable watch about how the past never stays in the past. Bill Murray, Sharon Stone, Jessica Lange and Jeffrey Wright all work well together.
The Bridge On The River Kwai Sun 21/2 TG4 @ 14.55
Burma. World War II. A group of prisoners of war being held in a Japanese camp are forced to build a bridge over a river who's name I can't recall. They want to sabotage it but their Colonel thinks building it properly will do them good. This film is a classic for a reason. It's nailbiting, exciting, even funny in places and although it's nearly 3 hrs long you'll be stuck to it. Excellent rainy Sunday watching. Alec Guinness and William Holden ably lead a mighty cast.
Suspicion Sun 21/2 BBC2 @ 15.40
Onboard a train a shy young, well off woman meets a charmer and it isn't long before she falls for him. But is he what he seems? From the master of thrillers Alfred Hitchcock comes another romantic and twisty/turny cracker that will keep you guessing. Joan Fontaine and Cary Grant are the leads and play off each other brilliantly. Grant lashes on his usual charm and Fontaine deserves every award she won for her role.
Crank : High Voltage Sun 21/2 Film4 @ 22.45
Chev Chelios is on the move again in a bonkers sequel to the 2006 hit. His heart has been stolen(literally) and only regular jolts of electricity are keeping him alive. Can he stay going long enough to get revenge? Absolutely unhinged stuff and definitely not for the faint hearted. Jason Statham has a ball in the lead role and Amy Smart & Dwight Yoakam in support just about manage to keep up with him
A Monster Calls Sun 21/2 BBC2 @ 23.15
A broken boy is having a hard time. His Da is gone, school is miserable and his Mam is sick. And now something supernatural has begun to menace him. But it's not what you think. A stunning film, and a look at grief through a child's eyes that will floor you, fill you with fear and eventually leave you an emotional wreck. But in a great way. Lewis MacDougall, Felicity Jones and Liam Neeson all nail their parts.
A Single Man Mon 22/2 Sony Movies @ 01.35
George isn't enjoying his glamorous Los Angeles lifestyle anymore. His boyfriend is dead a year and the early 60's era he's living in doesn't let him grieve properly. So he decides to take things into his own hands. You'll have to be made of stone not to be moved by Colin Firth's fantastic turn in a 2009 drama about loss and depression, truth and lies. It's upsetting stuff but it's powerful too.
Bringing Up Baby Mon 22/2 BBC2 @ 13.00
A paleontologist stressed out by his impending nuptials and his museum's urgent need for a donation finds his life getting complicated by a woman with an unusual pet who sets her sights on him. This highly entertaining screwball comedy directed by the renowned Howard Hawks is 83 years young and still feels fresh as a daisy. Katherine Hepburn and Cary Grant are stellar in the lead roles and their chemistry will enchant you.
Amanda Tues 23/2 Film4 @ 01.25
When is sister is killed in a tragedy ripped straight from recent French news, a man finds himself torn apart by sadness but finds some kind of direction when he has to take care of her orphaned daughter Amanda. This French drama feels a wee bit sloppy and simplistic in places but two beautifully naturalistic performances courtesy of Vincent Lacoste and Isaure Multrier keep things together.
Gaslight Tues 23/2 TCM @ 02.50
While still grieving the death of her aunt years before, the newly married Paula moves into the house where she died. Weird things begin to happen and Paula thinks she's cracking up. 76 years old and with a title that's still influencing society today, Gaslight is a gripping, unnerving watch that works perfectly even if you can guess how the story will go. Ingrid Bergman is a magnificent leading lady and the film features a splendid debut turn from Angela Lansbury.
Shallow Grave Tues 23/2 Film4 @ 21.00
3 young professionals are looking for a 4th to share their spacious Edinburgh apartment. Shortly after they find a person that suits them something happens that will really change their living arrangements for good. Danny Boyle's 1994 film debut is an effective and bitingly violent thriller that still has the power to shock. Flashes of dark humour and fine performances from Ewan McGregor, Kerry Fox and Christoper Eccleston ensure you'll find it all enjoyable.
Wind Chill Wed 24/2 The Horror Channel @ 02.40
On the day before Christmas eve a couple are heading home and decide to take a shortcut through the snowy wilderness. As you can probably guess things go sideways for them. Really sideways. Wind Chill starts off relatively normal before descending rapidly into a blast of surrealistic horror that's by turns bleak, terrifying and claustrophobic. It's not a fun watch but it's an interesting one. Emily Blunt and Martin Donovan do well here.
Mr Blandings Builds His Dream House Wed 24/2 BBC2 @ 13.00
The Blandings family have had enough of apartment life in New York city and decide a move to the countryside and life in a big spacious house is what's needed. If only things were so simple. This 73 year old farce is great craic and the comedic skills of Cary Grant (third time this week!) and Myrna Loy marry flawlessly with a well written and funny script. It was remade as The Money Pit and as they always say, the original is best.
Educating Rita Thur 25/2 BBC4 @ 21.00
Susan's sick of her dull married life and afraid that having a child will ruin her. Frank's a disillusioned college professor. When Susan decides to go back to college they meet. Filmed in Dublin this platonic love story is a surprising watch, never exactly doing what'd you'd expect it to do. Julie Walters in her debut role is quite remarkable and Michael Caine's part will remind you of at least one person you've met on your educational path.
Upgrade Fri 26/2 Film4 @ 21.00
Grey's in a bad way. An accident has ruined his life and left him a quadraplegic. But some ultra modern technology is about to give him his body back. And a whole host of other skills too. This 2018 sci-fi thriller is a very amusing and extremely violent slice of escapism that's packed with bonkers fight scenes and some rather dark themes and ideas. Logan Marshall-Green has a whale of a time in the lead role.
A Lonely Place To Die Fri 26/2 The Horror Channel @ 21.00
A group of mountaineers climbing in the Scottish highlands get more than they bargained for when they discover a young woman being held captive in the middle of nowhere. A lean, fast paced and exciting mish mash of genres starts off amiably enough before heading off somewhere vicious and unpredictable. A nice cast lead by Melissa George and Alec Newman helps keep proceedings grounded.
The Cured Fri 26/2 RTE2 @ 21.30
Dublin in the aftermath of a zombie plague is a strange place to live. It's even stranger for the zombies who have been cured because they can remember exactly who they killed and ate during their infection. It leads to some....issues. This 2017 Irish horror is a deadly twist on an old story. It's as bloody and gory as you'd expect but it's clever and subversive as well and a solid cast including Tom Vaughn-Lawlor, Elliot Page and Sam Keeley do nice work.
As always a retweet is appreciated if this guide is helpful or if you discovered something new. Thank you.
It's just been announced Ireland will stay in severe lockdown for another 9 weeks. It wasn't announced on the radio or on the news. Nope it was announced on the Irish Mirror's twitter account at half past fucking ten.
This government. My god.
Buzz knows.
I'm on my 44th episode of the Wire.
In 12 days.
Christ.
My eyes feel like soft boiled eyes at this stage.
I think the show is in my DNA at this stage.
When I go the shop I'm re-upping the milk instead of buying it.
I'm fighting the urge to call everyone a motherfucker.
Selling drugs is starting to feeling like a legitimate way to make money.
I've learnt from Mr Prezbo that height and arm span are the same thing. That's pretty cool though.
I've learned that lawyerly pinstriped affectations and tweedy impertinence are frowned upon.
I've also learned that ducks should never drink whiskey.
All I want to eat is a laketrout sub and I haven't a clue what a laketrout sub is.
I know more about American politics, the American school system and Stevedores than anyone.
10-32 is police code for man with gun.
11-46 means death.
If you've a boss like Frank Sobotka he'll look after you.
Even though the show ended 12 years ago google maps tells me Baltimore is still a shit hole.
I've a Greek song from season 2 stuck in my head for the past week and it got annoying 6 days ago.
I'm mad to try rice-a-roni.
I want to know how to play dice.
I can't get my head around why the fuck anyone would want to join the cops.
The words "Sunday morning truce" make perfect sense to me.
The next time I see someone asleep in a suit I'm going to cut their tie off.
I'd love to go on the piss with McNulty and The Bunk and I know it would probably kill me.
Bodie is still my favourite character even though he sells smack and killed his best friend.
If anyone asks you who Young Leak you should run away.
Pit Beef is another thing I want to try.
Oh and everyone should know someone like Proposition Joe.
Sigh.
Ok. May as well pop on episode 45.
Pray for me.
Today was a good day
And now to ease my passing into the next life courtesy of an extreme sugar high I'll be zoning out to the sounds of Beat Takeshi telling his 42 students to kill each other or die.
Now that's how to have a nice day in a covid age. Burp.
"The Panthers and the klan are one and the same. Their aim is to sow hatred and inspire terror." Words spoken by angry white men. Hmmm. We've heard similar disinformation recently haven't we.
Packing the same real life origins and emotional punch as Spike Lee's 2018 film Blackkklansman, Judas And The Black Messiah comes along at a troubled time, only weeks after the most powerful racist on Earth was kicked out of presidential office and his gun toting supporters stormed the Capitol building when he beckoned. When you watch this and reach it's angering conclusion you'd be thinking to yourself "at least things in America are better now" and seconds later you'll remember that it's only the fashions and haircuts that have changed. America is as racist now as it was then. Judas And The Black Messiah shows us the results of when that hate is part of the establishment.
In 1968 the Black Panther Party was thorn in the side of the establishment. Fred Hampton, Bobby Seale and Huey Newton had got the attention of the FBI and J. Edgar Hoover wanted them gone. A car thief called Bill O'Neal (Lakeith Stanfield) was arrested and given a choice of jail or rat duty, rat duty meaning going undercover with the Illnois chapter of the Black Panthers to gather intel on Fred Hampton (Daniel Kaluuya) for his FBI handler Roy Mitchell (Jesse Plemons). Bill took to his new job like a fish to water and his position in the organisation rose as Fred's name began to ring out amongst the disenfranchised and disillusioned of Chicago. Then friendships and loyalties started to make things that little bit more complicated.
The 2021 Academy Awards are taking place in April this year and it will be a crime if Lakeith Stanfield isn't at least nominated for Best Actor. He's amazing as a man torn between worlds, colour and loyalties. At first it will be Daniel Kaluuya that catches your eye with his charismatic, commanding, showboating take on the Black Messiah but gradually you'll realise that it's Judas that's stealing the limelight with a squirming, anguished turn that will make you both hate and, amazingly enough, empathise with him. He's a bad guy but he's a recognisably human one. Watching him slowly come apart as the screws are turned on him make things unbearably tense, even if you know how the story plays out.
It's a film you're better off going into cold because knowing the outcome will take away slightly from the final moments, a brilliantly put together montage of images, documentary footage and words on the screen that will leave you rattled. Throughout the movie a feeling of foreboding and fate settles over the story, a sense of "the house always wins" and the characters themselves know it, and seem to be at peace with it. How they react and interact with each other gives the film a warmth that at once feels at odds with the horrors they are facing and at the same time it suits the material perfectly. A grieving laugh over a bodily function, a shy build up to a kiss, the sheer joy of seeing a friend return after a long time. Scenes what imbue a hard, harsh story with so much heart.
Kaluuya and Stanfield nail the main roles but the supporting characters played by Algee Smith (Euphoria, Detroit), Ashton Sanders (Moonlight) and Dominique Fishback (The Deuce) add real backbone too. Fishback plays Deborah Johnson, partner to Fred, and she does superb work. She's really one to watch. Just watch her eyes in her last scene. Not a word spoken but emotion and brutal acceptance swirling across them. Her expression as a microcosm of the African American experience all across that country. It's here you'll break.
Judas And The Black Messiah is streaming online now. It's very good indeed and hopefully will get a cinema release later in the year. Watch it and learn that ignoring history dooms us to repeat it.
The Little Stranger Sat 13/2 CH4 @ 21.00
Just after the second world war a doctor is called to a crumbling country mansion to tend to a patient. It's a mansion his family has been long connected to and there's secrets lurking behind the walls of the old family home. Irish director Lenny Abrahamson's 2018 gothic chiller is a sedately paced affair but it's atmospheric twists and finely tuned performances from Domhnall Gleeson, Ruth Wilson and Will Poulter will hook you in fast.
Mulholland Drive Sat 13/2 TG4 @ 21.30
A fresh faced ingénue looking to be a star and an amnesiac woman recovering from a car crash meet and lean on each other to find answers in a sinister Hollywood. David Lynch's startling LA set drama/horror/thriller is a film you'll either love or despise but it's one that will worm it's way into your head and set up camp for days. Laura Harring and Naomi Watts lead a stunning cast. Don't watch this one while imbibing in any mind altering substances.
The Guest Sat 13/2 Sony Movies @ 22.50
A family is totally upended when a war veteran claiming to have been a friend of their dead son turns up at the door and wiggles his way into their life. An entertaining and knowing homage to the action films and home invasion thrillers of the 90's with a little splash of horror thrown in for good measure. Funny, nasty and totally absurd. This is a pleasing way to spend 2 hrs. Maika Monroe and Dan Stevens are both deadly.
Horns Sun 14/2 Film4 @ 01.10
One morning a young man wakes up with horns growing from his head and the ability to get people to admit their darkest secrets. Daniel Radcliffe shakes off his Harry Potter persona to star in this gory and surreal tale that will upset you in places and make you snort laughing in others. A genuine oddity of a film but one that's both original and interesting. Juno Temple, James Remar & Kathleen Quinlan shine too.
A Matter Of Life And Death Sun 14/2 BBC2 @ 14.15
A WW2 fighter pilot jumps to his death from a burning plane but due to an administrative error in Heaven he gets a chance to argue for his life. This is, simply put, an outstanding film. Yeah, it sounds silly but in the hands of Michael Powell & Emeric Pressburger it becomes a really affecting piece of work. It's wondrous stuff, packed with imagination and superb acting from David Niven and Kim Hunter amongst others.
Love, Simon Sun 14/2 Film4 @ 21.00
Simon is gay and no one knows. Not his family, not his friends. After he makes an online connection with a fellow classmate, a simple mistake sets in motion a choice that will change his life. This 2018 comedy romance is an enjoyable and emotive watch that will strike a chord with many young people struggling with personal issues and it's charming cast lead by Nick Robinson and Katherine Langford will keep you smiling throughout.
Edie Sun 14/2 BBC2 @ 22.45
Edie's 83 years old. Edie should be slowing down by now but nope, she wants to try something new after her husband's death so decides to climb the tallest mountain in Scotland. Did I mention Edie's 83? Sheila Hancock is great as a woman who's chosen to not give up on the dreams of youth quite yet. Add in nice supporting turns from Kevin Guthrie and Paul Brannigan and some glorious scenery and you get a very likable film.
Barry Lyndon Mon 15/2 TCM @ 07.25
The life and times of a young chancer in 18th century Ireland who is forced out of the country and has no choice but to join the British army. This is one of Stanley Kubrick's least talked about films but one of his most satisfying and humane ones. Ryan O'Neal plays the lead, and yeah his accent is ropey in places but he gets the job done. It's a beautiful looking film too who's pace may be offputting to some but stick with it and you'll love it.
Dallas Buyers Club Mon 15/2 TG4 @ 21.30
After taking a few too many risks in his personal life Ron finds out he's HIV positive and death is most likely soon. He sets out to do something about it. Then he realises he can help others too. Matthew McConaughey is in wicked form as an initially unpleasant chap who sees the error of his ways when it's just too late. A moving watch but one that finds time for a bit of humour too. Jennifer Garner and Steve Zahn do super things in support.
The Court Martial Of Billy Mitchell Tues 16/2 Film4 @ 14.50
Based on a true story, this film is about the trial of an army general, who when disillusioned by his superiors lack of belief in aerial warfare decided to question the system. An absorbing film about standing up for what you believe in from Otto Preminger led by an quality showing from Gary Cooper in the title role. Rod Steiger as a lawyer facing off against him steals the show though with a blistering performance.
The Hitch-Hiker Tues 16/2 Talking Picture TV @ Midnight
From the pen and directorial gaze of the mighty Ida Lupino comes the story of two fishermen who pick up a hitch-hiker who tells them he's going to murder them when their drive through the Californian desert comes to an end. This one's a cracker, a menacing, tension packed slice of film noir (first one ever directed by a woman btw) that moves like a train and leads to a very well earned finish. Edmond O'Brien, Frank Lovejoy and William Talman all play their parts effectively.
Beautiful Thing Wed 17/2 Film4 @ 23.20
Jamie and Steven are classmates living side by side in the concrete hell of a south London housing complex. They are also in love with each other but 1990's London is rather intimidating for young men who felt different. This one is a nice watch, sensitive and touching but with plenty of room for fun too. Glen Barry and Scott Neal do well as the lads but it's Linda Henry as Jamie's mam Sandra who really shines.
Rudderless Thur 18/2 CH4 @ 01.00
In the aftermath of an all too topical tragedy a father uses his son's direction and influence to give his life some meaning again. William H. Macy directs this lovely little story and does it well, deftly balancing light and dark moments. It's an upsetting but ultimately uplifting watch and has a excellent cast with Billy Crudup in the lead supported well by Felicity Huffman, Laurence Fishburne, Anton Yelchin & Macy himself.
Stan & Ollie Fri 19/2 BBC1 @ 20.25
Stan Laurel and Oliver Hardy have reached the twilight of their comedy career together and head across the Atlantic to try and revive their career. It's a trip that stirs up a lot of emotion. This is fantastic, a film for everyone. A universal tale of lifelong friendship and the stresses that can arrive along the way but also a beautifully told slice of cinematic history with Steve Coogan and John C.Reilly playing their parts wonderfully. Nina Arianda as the formidable Ida Laurel nails her part too.
Don't Go Fri 19/2 RTE2 @ 21.30
Ben and Hazel have moved to Ireland to restart their lives after the death of their daughter. Lately Ben has started to have strange dreams. Dreams that are having a huge effect on his waking life. This one is an odd watch that most definitely won't appeal to everyone but some startling imagery from the mind of Irish director David Gleeson and compelling turns from Stephen Dorff and Melissa George make it worth your time.
Witness Fri 19/2 BBC1 @ 23.35
In a Philadelphia train station a young Amish boy witnesses a murder and now the killers are out for his blood. To protect him a cop goes undercover in the Amish community and in doing so learns their way of life. A fine, slowburn thriller from director Peter Weir that gives us a look at a way of life rarely seen onscreen, while hitting all the beats you'd expect a crime drama to hit. Harrison Ford and Kelly McGillis work well together.
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Tom Hanks has long been compared to James Stewart. A Hollywood nice guy that nobody has a bad word to say about who also has a very amiable onscreen presence. Those comparisons go into overdrive with the release of News Of The World on Netflix. Like Stewart, Hanks has been around for years before starring in his first western. Should it be his last or could it be the start of a new career avenue?
Captain Jefferson Kyle Kidd (Hanks) has a unique job to do. Once a Confederate soldier, he now travels around the American South West in the aftermath of the Civil War reading newspapers aloud to the people in the towns he passes through. After leaving one such town he comes across a wrecked wagon and the lynched body of a Native American. In the wreck of the carriage he also finds a young white girl called Johanna (Helena Zengel) dressed in Native American clothing and he's instructed by a passing brigade of Union Soldiers to deliver the child to an army checkpoint where they will return her to the family she was taken from. There he's informed of a three month wait and so he decides to do the job himself, a task that will be made difficult by harsh terrain and the violent men that populate it.
News Of The World is a world apart from the action packed, tension fest's director Paul Greengrass has built his name on over the last two decades and it's all the better for it. It's a mature and considered look at what happens when two broken people are thrown together in a chaotic world. Gone are the shaky cam shots and the palpable sequences of suspense he's known for and in their place is beautiful unspoiled scenery and a couple of lost souls getting to know each other. Hanks can do this kind of thing in his sleep but his Captain Kidd is a hell of a likable person and it's easy to see why Johanna doesn't run screaming from him. That's not to say he's a pushover either but dignity and empathy don't have to be pushed aside by the ability to handle a double barrelled shotgun. Both can co-exist and Hank's combines them perfectly.
Little Helena Zengel (so good in System Crasher, check it out) nails the part of Johanna too. A child struck down by double tragedies but not ready to give up just yet. Johanna barely talks but her eyes betray the horrors she's seen. An innkeeper (Elizabeth Marvel) speaks the Kiowan language Johanna now converses in and gives Kidd a taste of her past in a gutpunch of a scene and it's here both begin to warm to each other and although it's done in a way we've seen a 1000 times before, it's still a joy to witness. The time and land they are travelling through is a dark, mean place and those slivers of warmth are what you'll be grasping for.
News Of The World might be set 150 years ago but it's not hard to spot the pointed similarities between America then and America now. Authority figures with itchy trigger fingers, blatant racism, violent bullying militia, and leaders using carefully chosen language and news to keep the populace in check. Parallels that come to a head in a coal mining town where Kidd is forced to read news to an unhappy crowd but then uses his showman skills to get out of a tricky situation. What happens next might be wish fulfillment but it's both a wink at the audience and a satisfying way out.
News Of The World is streaming now on Netflix and it is worth your time. It might be sedately paced but it leads to a well earned emotional climax that doesn't rely on cheap sentimentality. That's always welcome.
Oh btw, see if you can spot the BLATANT nod to The Searchers. Even if you haven't ever seen the film something will ring a bell. It made this ol' western nerd smile anyway.
It's finally happened. I've watched every single film and TV show I own.
What do i do now? Don't say buy more. That's just enabling.
I've no more room anyway.
Buy another shelving unit you say?
Well then I'll just have to fill that one too.
All these first world problems are the worst aren't they?
The 20th film on the video nasty DPP 39 list is a troubling watch. Unlike most of the other films it's not a horror but a home invasion thriller with a few faces you'd recognise. On paper it sounds surprisingly tame and then you start to watch and quickly realise why it ended up on that infamous list.
Jesse Lee Kane (William Sanderson) has just escaped from a prison transport van and along with his fellow inmates, Chino and Ling he goes on the run, killing anyone who gets in their way. During a liquor store robbery/murder they kidnap Corrie Turner (Yvonne Ross) and decide to hide out from the law in her house and in the process take her whole family hostage. Hostages that include her brother, her grandmother, her mother and her father Ted (Robert Judd). Jesse takes an instant dislike to Ted and tortures him both physically and psychologically. All the while Ted holds out until the moment he gets a chance to strike back.
Fight For Your Life was filmed in 1977 but didn't hit British shores until 1981 where it was instantly refused a cinema certificate. Distributors took advantage of the lawless early days of the video boom and released it on VHS and Betamax and less than 3 years later it became one of the notorious video nasties. The only one on the list for language. Language? Yup. There's racist invective in here that will turn your hair white courtesy of Jesse Lee Kane and his hatred for the Turner family. Every racial epiphet you've ever heard is spewn here and plenty you haven't. It's a torrent of bigotry and christ is it hard to watch. God only knows how difficult is was for the actors facing it. Throughout the film the Turner family is beaten, raped, almost lynched and verbally abused and the only reason you'll keep watching is for the revenge you know is coming. And then when it finally arrives it ....... well it falls curiously flat. It's tame, rushed and ends with a whimper leaving you with the distinct impression the film was made with only one thing in mind. And that one thing wasn't the justice portion of the story. Far be it for me to say what writer Straw Weisman and director Robert A. Endelson were thinking when they made this but you could get the feeling at times that their motives weren't pure.
Like fellow nasty, I Spit On Your Grave this is a revenge thriller in name only. And like ISOYG it revels in it's nastiness, rubs it in your face, spends far more time on it than anything else. Bafflingly ISOYG has been reappraised as a feminist classic in recent years but I can't seen FFYL being reappraised anytime soon. There's a real tang of unpleasantness about it all and in today's climate and with it's complexities regarding racial issues it's no surprise a modern release hasn't been attempted in the UK. It probably could get an uncut release now but there'd be uproar about it the second social media got wind of it. Actually, thinking on it, I'm amazed it hasn't had a disc release because those boutique film distributors who specialise in releasing the nasties love a dose of controversy. Uproar always sells films.
Is it any good though? Not really. Leads William Sanderson (who went on to play Mayor E.B. Farnum in Deadwood) and Robert Judd aside it's an amateurish affair and it looks like an episode of a cheap TV show. There's no redeeming values here, there's nothing on offer. Even the worst nasties like Devil Hunter and Bloody Moon gave us something to laugh at (not with, at) but here you'll just cringe. It's bad when an 89 minute long film becomes an ordeal.
Is Fight For Your Life worth your time and/or money. Nope. If you're desperate to see it look it up on youtube.
Did it deserve it's banned status? I can see why it happened.
What's next? Flesh For Frankenstein. Thankfully one of the most enjoyable of the nasties. I need fun after this one.
