April 01, 2019

Game Of Thrones S06 E09 - Battle Of The Bastards


Meereen is still under heavy siege. The place is smouldering and parts of it are already destroyed. The death toll is rising at as explosive fireballs blow the populace to pieces.From her temple above the city Daenerys watches the destruction. She seems oddly unworried. Tyrion meanwhile is terrified by it all. 

He knows the masters will not stop until Meereen is razed to the ground. Tyrion wants to negotiate with the masters. Daenerys' plan is rather more simple. Kill the masters. Burn the fleets. Her plans remind Tyrion of her father, the Mad King. All he wanted to do was destroy all around him too. This persuades her to listen to Tyrion's plan. A plan that both will like.

The masters will let her go free to Westoros if she gives up her army and kills her dragons. She has a different idea. Drogon appears, terrifying the masters. She climbs on his back and along with her other 2 dragons, Rhaegal and Viserion they soar over the city.

Outside the city the Sons of the Harpy are butchering innocent civilians by the hundreds. This comes to a rapid halt when the Dothraki horde, led by Daario Naharris ride up and make mincemeat of all of them. Daario is good at the one handed head lop. Fair play to him.

Hovering over the attacking ships in the bay. Daenerys utters one word "Dracarys" and her trio of dragons unleash hell on the ships below. Enemy soldiers die in their thousands. Meanwhile Greyworm and the Unsullied take the 3 head masters captive. 

Daenerys has decreed one must die. The other 2 masters instantly give up the only lowborn master. Greyworm then kills the 2 treacherous bastards and the surviving master is sent to warn the others of Daenerys power. They won't mess with her again. Not after this display.

Meanwhile Jon is leading his forces towards Winterfell. He's heading home. It's been a long time. Before any battle takes place he first has a parlay with Ramsay Bolton. Sansa has come along too to face the man who tortured her. Ramsay stares lavasciously at her and it's a struggle for her not to puke her guts up at the memory of what he put her through.

Ramsay demands that they surrender and hand over Sansa. If they do he'll pardon Jon for leaving the Night's Watch and pardon all the other families for joining up with him. Jon has another idea. Solve it all with single combat. Jon v Ramsay. Ramsay the coward of course declines and remind Jon he has Rickon by showing him his dead Direwolf's head.

Ramsay tells Jon he's starved his dogs so he can feed the Stark army to them. They decide to stage the battle the next morning. Him, Davos and Tormund discuss the plan of action. Due to Ramsay's larger size they need to be tactical. They can't allow him to use his horses to attack from both sides. They have to face each other dead on.

Sansa tells them they won't win with such a small army. Ramsay has twice as many men and he likes to inflict pain. She tells Jon the battle won't go the way he expects. She knows Ramsay's mind. And she knows whatever happens Rickon will die. He's Ned Starks true son. He's too important to let live. And if Ramsay wins, she'll kill herself to avoid him.



Outside Tormund and Davos discuss their fighting history and both realise Jon is the man they should have been following all along. Tormund goes for a drink. Davos goes for a walk and a think. 

Jon goes to visit Melisandre for advice. He also asks her not to resurrect him again if he dies. This time just let him be. She tells him it's not his decision. The Lord Of Light will decide his fate not her.

Davos's walk leads him to the through the camp that was built when Stannis fought Ramsay and failed. Here he finds an execution pyre and below it a toy belonging to Stannis's daughter Shireen, Davos's friend. Now he knows how she died and he realises Melisandre had a hand in her death.

At Meereen Yara and Theon and their forces have arrived. Tyrion met Theon before but Theon is a very different man now than he was then. Yara offers Daenerys 100 ships and men to sail them in return for her supporting Yara's takeover of the Iron Islands. The idea of a queen over the Iron islands appeals to Daenerys.

She asks why she shouldn't just support Euron and when she realises Euron is a scumbag she decides to support Yara. Her and Yara instantly build a rapport. Yara agrees to support Daenerys claim to the Westoros. They pledge allegiance to each other. That's the way to do it. No need for bloodshed at all.

Outside Winterfell battle is about to begin. On Jon's side a big army plus Wun Wun the giant. On Ramsay's side a huge army. Ramsay rides out in front of his army. With Rickon tied to the back of his horse. Christ. What has he planned here? He cuts Rickon free and tells him to run to his brother Jon. Then he takes out his bow and arrow.

Cruelly Rickon is cut down by an arrow just before he gets to Jon. He dies in front of his brother's eyes. Jon loses it and races towards the Ramsay forces all by himself. It's a suicide mission. Ramsay's horses bear down on him. Is he going to die again? Then just as they collide his own cavalry rip in all around him.




The clash is FUCKING IMMENSE. The battlefield is instantly covered in guts and flame. It's brutal. Ramsay's men fire arrows into the melee not caring who's side get hit. 

Men die in their hundreds. The battle rages around Jon. It's a genuinely jaw dropping moment. Horses, arrows and sword miss him by millimetres. The violence, oh sweet mother of jesus the violence. It's a terrifying thing to be right in the middle of.

Soldiers from both sides are dropping like flies. Tormund is in his element. Ramsay is still lashing arrows into the battlefield without a care in the world. The sheer amount of dead bodies is starting to build a wall that people have to climb over. Its a vision of hell. Davos and his men run out of arrow and charge in to shore up the back.




Ramsay is loving this . He can smell victory. He decides to send in the remainder of his ground troops led by Smalljon Umber. In the midst of battle Jon's life is saved by Tormund. Wun Wun points out the incoming troops who are now easily surrounding them. They're trapped between a wall of corpses and a wall of Bolton troops.

The troops close in with spears held out. The violence is hideous. The whole thing is hugely claustrophobic. The North fights back. Wun Wun starts to decimate the Bolton troops in front of him. Jon and Davos hack and slash everything in front of them.

It's to no avail though. The Bolton troops keep coming. Jon falls over and gets trampled. Bodies keep piling on top of him. He's suffocating. This is genuinely the scariest moment of the show so far. He looks like he's dying. Again.

But somehow he drags himself out. He's reborn from under a pile of death. In the distance he sees Wun Wun the giant pierced with a dozen arrows but keep fighting. Beside him Tormund rips out Smalljon Umber's throat with his bare teeth. Then they all hear a horn. 

It's Littlefinger (ugh) and his knights of the vale riding to their rescue. Sansa is by their side. Ramsay looks terrified by the sheer number of them. The Knights destroy the Bolton troops, riding through the like butter. It's a glorious sight and one that inspires Jon and the lads to keep fighting.

Jon climbs through the corpses. He can see Ramsay. Ramsay can see him too and like the sap he is he retreats into Winterfell castle. Jon, Tormund and Wun Wun run after him. Sansa sees this and decides to follow. She doesn't want to miss out on her revenge.

Wun Wun breaks down the castle gates but not before he's riddled with 100 arrows. Ramsay fires a fatal one into his head and he dies looking into Jon's eyes. Jon then runs at Ramsay. Finally he'll have his one on one with him.

He kicks the everloving shit out of Ramsay as his troops swarm in and finish off the Bolton soldiers. As expected Ramsay is a wimp and can't begin to fight back. It looks like Jon is about to beat him to death until Sansa steps in. She wants him for herself.

The Starks have retaken their ancestral home. The Stark sigil replaces the Bolton ones hanging from the walls. Winterfell is Jon and Sansa's again. It's been a long time since he was home. It's been a long time since she felt at peace at home.

Rickon's body is recovered and prepared for burial in the vault. That night Sansa visits a bloodied Ramsay in his cell. She threatens to feed him to his hounds. He insists they won't harm him. She reminds him that he's been starving them. She frees the hounds. They rip him asunder. Starting with his face. 



An amazing episode. Game Of Thrones at its most epic. The Daenerys & dragons scene was awe inspiring but the battle of the bastards was astounding. Insane, terrifying, nauseating, brilliance. 

Next up - The Winds of Winter

Series 1 - 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10


Series 2 - 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10


Series 3 - 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10


Series 4 - 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10


Series 5 - 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8  9  10


Series 6 - 1  2  3  4  5  6  7  8

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